WWE Summerslam 2014 Predictions

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Here come the pain.

At least, I hope that is what is coming when Brock and John Cena go at it on Sunday night. Summerslam has built itself up nicely and I am looking forward to most of the card. Of course with anything WWE, it can go south oh so quick.

Predicta-tron 3000, power up!

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-Seth Rollins vs. Dean Ambrose in a Lumberjack Match

Talk about unrealized expectations. This match could have been one of the strongest on the card. Instead, of all the stipulations that could have been put with this match, we get one of the most nonsensical in the wrestling playbook. I want Rollins and Ambrose to have open space to work with. Rollins’ high flying and the Ambrose character makes for some outside the ring fun. Still think they can put on a great match even with the handcuffs.

Winner- Dean Ambrose with Dirty Deeds and they’re done dirt cheap for only $9.99 a month.

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-Paige vs. AJ for the Divas Championship

AJ and Paige is exactly what the Divas division needed. Now that we have no blurred lines about Paige, we can enjoy two women that can entertain on the mic and in the ring. AJ should retain here because Paige’s character is so good in chase of the title.

Winner- AJ by submission which means we all win.

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-Randy Orton vs Roman Reigns

Orton and Reigns have been wrestling at house shows the past few weeks and all indications are that the matches have not exactly been good. Let’s hope that is just because Randy was worn out from a room full of gym bags and they can bring it on Sunday. This is Reigns first chance to show himself in a PPV match where he is not protected by multiple wrestlers. If Reigns is going to be their “it” guy, it begins here.

Winner- Reigns hits the Samoan triple play (aka the new Five Moves of Doom).

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-The Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler for the Intercontinental Championship

Like many fans out there I have been happy with Ziggler’s push over the past weeks. He has picked up some good wins, but I hope you all realize it was to build up The Miz in the end. Now that Ziggler is on a streak it makes Miz look better by beating him. This match is a win/win because Ziggler is in a championship match and The Miz is back where he needs to be, being an asshole.

Winner- The Miz by shenanigans.

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-Rusev vs. Jack Swagger in a Flag Match

This may seem like a WCW match, but that is only because it is like a WCW match. The stipulation seems to be an easy way to get Swagger a win without Rusev taking a pin. They will probably have another match at Night of Champions where Rusev wins and he can move on to a feud with someone bigger on the roster.

Winner- Swagger puts the flag…somewhere wearing a coal miner’s glove and climbs to retrieve Scott Hall’s contract while Judy Bagwell hangs from a cage.

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-Brie Bella vs. Stephanie McMahon

The match between a woman who is known for nip slips and a woman I wish would have nip slips. A bit sexist, but honest. This will be painful to watch. They will try their best, and like the promo work, Stephanie will carry the load even though she hasn’t wrestled in ten years. Our best hope is a Daniel Bryan sighting. I hate that there is a rehashed TNA storyline waiting on him.

Winner- Stephanie with a pedigree as she looks on with those eyes. Damn, those eyes.

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-Chris Jericho vs. Bray Wyatt

This past Monday did a lot to get me interested in this match again. These two started off on fire then it seem to hit cruise control like most stuff that takes over a month in WWE, which I blame on creative, not the wrestlers. The sit down “interview” was what I wanted to see the whole time. Wyatt showing why he is the best promo man today (besides Paul Heyman) and Jericho holding his own in response. The match should be more intense than their last one with Wyatt going over.

Winner- Wyatt hits Sister Abigail (which in the NFL would get you a two game suspension).

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-John Cena vs. Brock Lesnar for the WWE World Heavyweight Championship

Proof that breaking the streak did what it needed to do. It makes Brock the unstoppable force that he should have been the entire time since he came back. I loved their match at Extreme Rules 2012. It was heavy hitting and brutal by the PG standard we have now. Cena winning made no sense at all because it took away any aura that Brock had. It took him beating The Undertaker at Wrestlemania to show he was a force. I do expect this to be just as stiff as the Extreme Rules match. The buildup has been good with Paul Heyman doing what he does best and Cena giving impassioned promos without resorting to jokes which is his downfall. Brock and CM Punk had the Match of the Year at last year’s Summerslam. Could he make it two in a row?

Winner Brock with a lot of F5’s because we known Cena is kicking out more than two.


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