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  • Review Roundup: Metal Gear Solid V: Ground Zeroes

    metal-gear-solid-ground-zeroes-phantom-pain

    Snaaaaaaaaaake!

    I couldn’t resist. I apologize.

    Today is the release of the uber-demo Metal Gear Solid V: Ground Zeroes which leads into the full game, Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain. While the game’s length may have been a point of contention for fans, the reviews suggest that the fun you will have should outweigh any reservations you had about playtime.

    Except Polygon, of course.

    IGN– 8/10

    “Ground Zeroes is so adept at generating tension that at times it felt like I was playing a survival horror game. While Boss has never been more flexible; able to roll and jump and shoot in line with today’s top third-person action-adventure games, enemies are smart and plentiful. In the harsh light of day – and played on Hard mode – they possess cruel 20/20 vision, and react to every little movement or shifting shadow by becoming more efficacious in their patrolling.”

    Kotaku– YES

    “Shortly after beginning the game, I spent a good thirty minutes just making my way back and forth between two buildings, knocking out guards, seeing how long it would take them to wake back up, trying to distract them and see how close I could get to them before they noticed me. If you’re into that sort of experimentation, you’ll find a rewarding chemistry set in Ground Zeroes.”

    Polygon– 5.5/10

    “All told, the titular Ground Zeroes mission took me one hour and 16 minutes to complete, including cutscenes and about eight deaths. That’s not the game clock, either. That’s real time. The mission is not only short, it’s dull. Your objectives amount to going to one place, rescuing a prisoner, going to another place, rescuing another prisoner, and then calling in a helicopter to get you out of there. Underwhelming doesn’t begin to describe it.”

    Videogamer– 8/10

    “It’s flexible enough to enable players to come up with their own battle plans, and once Ground Zeroes is over there are five Side Ops missions (encompassing assassination, hostage extraction, espionage and more) that take place at different times of day. Again, it shows off the pliability of the world, while also giving the lighting engine a good run out. It’s literally not found wanting come rain or shine.”

    Game Informer– 7/10

    “Ground Zeroes makes a fantastic first impression. It is gorgeous, from the facial capture to the environmental textures. Even the little touches, like lens flare and particle effects, are impeccable. The camera angles are cool, the art direction is interesting, and the production values are high. Snake’s mission in the prison camp is undoubtedly a feast for the eyes, but if you want meaningful content, you’re going to leave hungry.”

    Joystiq– 3.5/5

    “The longer you stay with Ground Zeroes and its shooter-style control scheme (for real, this time), the more you diverge from your old style of play, even if your intent is to be more of a ghost than a ghost-making machine. On one end of the Metal Gear spectrum, you drag a squirming guard behind a building and choke him into mandatory silence. On the other end, you commandeer a giant emplaced machine gun – let’s call it the “on-site procurement” that’s been encouraged since MGS1 – and blow everyone away. Metal Gear Solid 5: Ground Zeroes rewards stealth purists with a better score, but trigger-happy improvisers get a satisfying body count.”

  • This One Time, On The Internet- March 17, 2014

    The Incredibles

    Here are the quick hits from the world of movies, TV, games, blacksmithing, hummus, whatever catches our fancy.

    Movies

    Pixar

    The Incredibles and Ratatouille will be converted to 3D for future re-release in theaters. Never cared for Ratatouille that much, but I will gladly pay handsomely to see Frozone in 3D.

    The Amazing Spider-Man

    Marc Webb will not be returning to direct The Amazing Spider-Man 4 (yes, 4). Ease up there Sony, Spider-Man is not The Avengers. Let’s not get too far ahead of ourselves.

    Wolverine

    James Mangold will begin work on the follow-up to The Wolverine after X-Men: Apocalypse releases in 2016. With Hugh Jackman recently saying his tenure as the adamantium man is winding down, I can see this being his final hoorah as Wolvie.

    Maleficent

    Here is a new banner for Maleficent starring Angelina Jolie. This time she has wings. She gained horns last poster. Slowly they are just revealing she is Satan incarnate before the movie opens.

    maleficent-banner-poster1

    TV

    American Horror Story

    Writer Douglas Petrie has revealed that the fourth season of the horror anthology show will have a carnival theme in the 1950’s. As fu**ed up as AHS is, this is the perfect setting. Plus, I miss Carnivale and this will fill a need.

    The Walking Dead

    Anyone get traumatized by last night’s episode “The Grove”? If you are a comic fan, you are used to this, I want to know the soccer mom reaction.

    Games

    Gauntlet

    The classic dungeon-crawler is getting a reboot this summer by WB Games. Check out the trailer below and remember the times wasting too much money on the arcade machine in a Mexican restaurant. Maybe that is just me.

    Watch Dogs

    Ubisoft is saying that it will take average players between 35-40 hours to complete the story with some free-roaming while completing the entire game could be around 100 hours. That is worth $60 if true.

  • Weekend Box Office- March 14-16, 2014

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    Poor Jesse. Without Walter everything is falling apart.

    Need For Speed was expected to finish first this past weekend, but had to settle for a disappointing third place with $17.8 million. A new Fast & Furious franchise this is not.

    300: Rise of an Empire held strong in its second weekend even though it lost its top spot to Mr. Peabody & Sherman. The CGI dog and kid combo brought in $21.2 million.

    Veronica Mars cracked the top ten with $2 million playing in under 400 theaters. Nice job, marshmallows.

    1. Mr. Peabody & Sherman- $21.2 million/ $63.2 million

    2. 300: Rise of an Empire- $19.1/ $78.3

    3. Need For Speed- $17.8/ $17.8

    4. Non-Stop- $10.6/ $68.8

    5. The Single Moms Club- $8.3/ $8.3

    6. The LEGO Movie- $7.7/ $236.9

    7. Son of God- $5.4/ $50.9

    8. The Grand Budapest Hotel- $3.6/ $4.8

    9. Frozen- $2.1/ $396.4

    10. Veronica Mars- $2.0/ $2.0

  • This One Time, On The Internet- March 14, 2014

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    Here are the quick hits from the world of movies, TV, games, K-Mart locations, laserdisc collections, whatever catches our fancy.

    Movies

    Avengers: Age of Ultron

    Marvel Studios president Kevin Feige says we can look forward to Hawkeye and Hulk having larger roles in the sequel. This pleases me.

    “Part of the fun of Age of Ultron was saying, you’ve seen another Iron Man adventure before, you see another Thor adventure and another Cap adventure, but we haven’t seen the Green Goliath again. So that was important in the characters you haven’t seen – Hulk being one of them and Hawkeye being one of them – Ultron will make up for it. They have very big parts in Age of Ultron.”

    Pan

    In the long, successful tradition of actors playing characters of different ethnicity, like Johnny Depp in The Lone Ranger or Al Jolson in The Jazz Singer, Rooney Mara (The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo) has been cast as Tiger Lily in 2015’s Pan. This movie sounds like a scene out of Dragon Tattoo…very uncomfortable to sit through.

    Captain America: The Winter Soldier

    Sebastian Stan has revealed that he has a nine picture deal with Marvel Studios. Get ready for Winter Soldier to be around for a long time.

    Arnold Schwarzenegger

    Watching Arnold crush things with a tank is somehow deeply satisfying. He is doing it for charity as well, so no shame in helping out.

    Games

    Titanfall

    Amazon raised Prime prices this week and now they have been caught deleting low scores for Titanfall by NeoGAF. Ruh Roh, Shaggy.

    Valve

    Check out the redesigned Steam controller which still looks weird as hell, but now with A,B,X and Y buttons.

    271963-h1

    Street Fighter

    Street Fighter: Assassin’s Fist, an original web series, will debut on Machinima. It can’t be any worse than the last two movies…can it? At least the video has no Van Damme or Kristin Kreuk although it looks like the grand master is wearing one hell of an anal bead necklace.

    http://youtu.be/GYjIT-HALrY

    Books

    Harry Potter

    JK Rowling has released a new 2,400 word piece called History of the Quidditch World Cup. It is free and can be read on Pottermore.

  • Captain America 3 To Open Against Batman Vs. Superman

    Photo courtesy comicvine.com
    Photo courtesy comicvine.com

    When it was announced that Batman vs. Superman had been delayed to May 6, 2016 we knew that was a date that Marvel had already staked out for an unknown film. Through the power of the internet we now know that it will be Captain America who gets to honor to take on DC’s two mightiest heroes.

    While superhero battles are great in the comics, it sucks for movie fans. Now, your uber-fans are going to see both in the same weekend, but with theater trips costing your first-born son these days, there will have to be a choice made for most. I hope that one studio backs off and changes dates because both of these movies are large enough that they need to have their own weekend in the spotlight.

    If I had to play the guessing game as to who would flinch first, it would be Marvel. Captain America is a big property, of this there is no doubt, yet, he is not on the same level as Iron Man or Avengers (at least in the Marvel cinematic universe).

    If these two movies do open against each other I would have to give the edge to Batman and Superman. This will be the third Cap film up against the two biggest comic characters in history. Even with all the bitching about Batfleck (even though I think he will own it), there will be a curiosity by moviegoers to see how the first movie team-up goes with the Man of Steel and the Dark Knight.

    If both movies open on the same weekend which one will you be seeing first?

     

     

     

  • On the Shoulders of Giants: Trey’s Titanfall Review

    Titanfall Logo

    Yesterday, for the first time in years, I took an entire day off doing one single thing: Playing a video game. With the exception of breaks for meals, doing some laundry between matches, and reading a chapter of The Fellowship of the Ring before bed, I didn’t do anything yesterday other than play Titanfall. In the interest of full disclosure, the event actually began at around 8:30 Tuesday night, since my entire team had the day off on Wednesday. That means a solid 24 hours was mostly dedicated to playing Titanfall.

    This is going to be one of the easiest reviews I’ve ever written, because Titanfall can be boiled down to a single question: Do you have a core group of friends you play online shooters with? If the answer is “yes,” you don’t really need the review, as I assume you’re already playing Titanfall. If the answer is “no,” and you’re wondering if Titanfall is worth it solo, I’m afraid I have some bad news: It’s not worth it solo.

    By “solo,” I mean playing the game solely with an interest in the story being offered, without worrying about being “good” at the game from a multiplayer perspective. For starters, there is ZERO in the way of a single-player experience. This is SOCOM and MAG taken to the next level; yes, there is a campaign, but you literally play through nine of the game’s fifteen maps with some audio and special intro scenes thrown in for good measure. There are other players playing with you, on each side of the story, and to keep things fair it doesn’t matter whether you win or lose each match.

    I knew going in that I wouldn’t care about the story, which is good, because it’s delivered in three of the least efficient manners imaginable in a game like this:

    1)      Audio that plays in the match lobbies.

    2)      Scenes that happen at the beginning and end of each match.

    3)      Audio and picture-in-picture video that plays during the match.

    So basically, they try to tell you the story while you are talking with your team or party about the last match, figuring out your loadouts, talking about the match that just finished, or worst of all, while you are PLAYING THE GAME. I don’t know about you, but in a fast-paced FPS featuring giant robots and jetpacks, I am devoting less-than-zero attention to watching the little video at the top corner of my screen.

    The game randomly picks which side you play as – IMC or Militia – when you begin a campaign, and automatically puts you on the other side when you start your next run. You can’t select individual missions until you’ve beaten both campaigns, which you’ll need to do to unlock all three titan cores. This can be a little frustrating if you’re playing with a party where everyone is at a different part of the game, but we found ways around it until all of us had completed each mission from both sides.

    The side you’re on affects what audio, intro, and in-game story bits you see and hear, but the matches themselves have almost no impact on the story. For instance, one match involves the Militia trying to overload some reactors while the IMC defends them it a hardpoint domination game type. Even if the IMC wins by a landslide, the story finds a way to still have the reactors detonate. This also leads to weird situations when a match is close, where your pilots’ COs alternate radio chatter between “we’re crushing them” and “our forces are being decimated.”

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JtbKyM263tE

    To be as honest as possible, I refrained from doing any research for these next paragraphs, which is the best story synopsis I can give based on having played the campaign from both sides twice: The games takes place far into space, on the “Fringe,” and focuses on a war between the IMC and the Militia. The IMC has decided to start using AI-controlled soldiers called sentinels. The Militia is losing badly, until the IMC ends up attacking a colony where an old, presumed-dead war hero is living. He joins the Militia, and together they stage a series of attacks on IMC bases.

    Along the way, you’ll play missions with objectives like stealing data from a crashed IMC ship, taking over anti-ship guns to attack a dry-docked IMC ship, and bringing down towers around an IMC base to allow the giant, vicious life-forms that live on the planet to attack. There are also at least three missions where I can’t remember who’s doing what, to whom, or why.

    This culminates in an attack on some kind of base on a world directly next to a star, in which the war hero sacrifices himself, and an IMC commander defects to the Militia, and control of the IMC is granted to Skynet… sorry, “Spyglass,” and a heavily-accented sociopath is a dick to everyone. There are some vague shots of spaceships, and some radio chatter from the corresponding sides. Then, for some reason, the game doesn’t end; there is a final mission where the Militia attacks the sentinel manufacturing facility, and the game essentially gives you another set of vague shots of spaceships and radio chatter.

    If my recollection seems very pro-Militia, it’s because the game doesn’t even try to blur the lines about who the heroes of the game are. The very first mission involves a Militia raid on a fueling facility; if you’re the IMC, you have to stop them, despite the fact that there are numerous civilian ships with the fleet. If you “win,” the heavily-accented psychopath remarks that “Today’s civilians are tomorrow’s militia.” The very next mission starts with sentinels slaughtering civilians, and that same asshole remarking that it’s not a good enough test of their capabilities.

    The woman in this picture could be named Tits McGee for all I know.
    The characterin this picture could be named Tits McGee for all I know.

    All that to say this: I don’t remember a single character name, meaningful moment, or piece of non-cliché dialogue, and I played this through four times. So when I say that the game isn’t worth it for the solo experience, that’s what I mean. Nothing this game provides is worth it outside of the core experience of playing the game. If you think you can play the game online, but without a team or core group, then it might be worth it to keep reading.

    Now that you’ve made it to this point, forget the last four paragraphs and read this: Titanfall is the single best multiplayer experience since Bad Company 2, in my opinion. It is the culmination of a lineage going back to CoD 4: Modern Warfare, and is actually made by many of the same people. It borrows and learns from Battlefield, Halo, Call of Duty, Counter-Strike, Team Fortress, and a half-dozen other pedigree franchises.

    As a moderate FPS veteran of multiple console generations, nothing in the game feels out-of-place, unnatural, or difficult to grasp. There’s a twenty-minute training simulator at the very beginning that gives you the basics, but moves along nicely to keep it from getting boring. There are a few mechanics, such as wall-hanging – hold left-trigger while on a wall – that I didn’t know about until they popped up on a loading screen tip. It also seems like you can switch pilot loadouts at any time without a respawn, or maybe in it’s just in certain circumstances; I really don’t know. These oversights in the tutroial are minor at best.

    Basically, you spend all of your time either as a pilot or piloting a titan; playing as a pilot is like Call of Duty with jetpacks and parkour, and piloting a titan will feel familiar to anyone who has ever played another game with mechs. There are different weapons, perks, explosives, and whatnot available on both sides, and pretty much any play style can be rewarding if utilized correctly. I will say this, though: Moving around on the ground, half-crouched any checking corners is going to get you murdered.

    Titanfall Mobility

    The game is a symphony of mobility, and the most effective players are going to be the ones who can learn how to think in three dimensions, more than any other game on the market. In hardpoint domination, for instance, most areas can be accessed from any side, from above, and potentially from below. While titans can’t jump, players seem to be quickly adapting to the idea that you can call a titan in and then keep moving around outside of it.

    This is accomplished by the game’s impressive auto-titan AI system for the mechs, which can be set to either guard a location or follow you as best they can. More than once I’ve left my titan to guard an area and then run off elsewhere. There are limits – stay gone for too long or go too far and your titan will shut down until you climb aboard again – but the game obviously encourages this play-style. In fact, a later perk allows your titan to be more accurate and efficient while in auto-titan mode.

    The game also rewards people who can manage multiple loadouts as necessary. I tend to find two loadouts, tops, that I excel at and stick with them. In Titanfall, though, I actually have all six loadouts ready at any given time, and switch freely between tactics. The same goes for titan loadouts; what may work well if I’m piloting manually in an attrition game doesn’t necessarily perform well in guard mode during a capture the flag.

    124510-titanfall_screen_2

    The only mechanic that the game really fails at explaining is “burn cards,” though we all pieced them together fairly quickly. Basically, these are one-time use bonuses that last from when you use them until you die and respawn. You have a maximum of three slots, and cards can be set in each slot from your deck between matches. Once in a match, they can be activated from the loadout menu. Some will kick in instantly, others not until your next spawn, and you can only have one active at a time.

    The effects they offer include upgraded perks, enhanced weapons, extra XP, or even instant-access to a titan; normally, titans have a “build timer” that can be reduced by scoring points in various ways. There is a twenty-five card limit to your deck, so it’s worthwhile to use and even discard cards frequently. Early on I tried to keep cards for “that one special occasion,” but quickly found this wasn’t worth the space, as I just never used those cards.

    Interestingly enough, I’ve already written a fair amount more than I intended to, or even really thought possible. To be honest, though, I don’t really think I’ve offered much insight; I’m ok with that, because again, there’s no insight to offer. Odds are anyone with even a passing interest in this game already owns it, especially if they have friends they game with. I’m sure there are a handful of FPS enthusiasts out there who won’t mind picking it up and playing with strangers; if so, more power to them, because this is a Hell of a game.

    As multiplayer-driven experiences like Call of Duty and Battlefield have grown bloated in recent years, I’ve stood by and sneered. I don’t have anything against a great multiplayer experience, but all I saw was the same game coming out ad-infinitum. If you had told me I would willingly pay $60 for a game that was online-only, and featured a lackluster campaign I would only grind through to get unlocks, I would not have been pleasant in response. As it stands – or, in this case, falls – I’m going to wrap up the review here, “because Titanfall.”

    I downloaded Titanfall directly from the Xbox One marketplace. It was my first time ever getting a launch of this magnitude digitally, and I have no complaints thus far. It is also [amazon_link id=”B00DB9JYFY” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]available on PC, and will be released for the Xbox 360 on March 25.[/amazon_link]

  • Eight Minutes Of Infamous: Second Son Gameplay

    Don’t worry PS4 owners. While Xbox One is enjoying the release of Titanfall this week you are only a week away from Infamous: Second Son. While it is nothing like Titanfall, it is good to have an exclusive title to enjoy.

    Check out this video just released that shows eight minutes of gameplay from the third game in the series. If you have played the first two games it will look very familiar and very pretty as new hero Delsin makes his way around Seattle.

    Infamous: Second Son releases on March 21st.

     

  • Pete Holmes Is Ready For Some “Fun In The Chun”

    Pete Holmes has already taken Ryu to task about the new standards and practices for Street Fighter, now he has to do the same for Chun-Li.

    Let’s just all accept that growing up playing Street Fighter we did not always pick Chun-Li because of her fighting skills, but because of her short skirt, long legs and her need to do many split-legged attacks.

    God, that Street Fighter movie was straight from the devil’s taint. Sorry, random thought.

     

  • This One Time, On The Internet- March 12, 2014

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    Here are the quick hits from the world of movies, TV, video games, air fresheners, bowling shoes, whatever catches our fancy.

    Movies

    Fletch

    Jason Sudeikis is in talks to take over the role of Irwin M. Fletcher in Warner’s reboot of the Fletch franchise. Chevy Chase played the role twice (perfectly) in Fletch and Fletch Lives. Go back and watch them and realize that Sudeikis will own this role.

    Fantastic Four

    It seems the hunt for Doctor Doom has been narrowed to four actors. They are Toby Kebbell, Sam Riley, Eddie Redmayne and Domhnall Gleeson. Never heard of them? Good. I think more unknowns should get some of these comic roles going around.

    The LEGO Movie

    Chris McKay has been picked to direct The LEGO Movie 2. Phil Lord and Chris Miller, the directors of the first movie, will return as producers. McKay has directed Adult Swim shows Moral Oral and Robot Chicken. Let’s get Seth Green involved and everything will be awesome.

    Transformers: Age of Extinction

    A new IMAX poster has just been released for the robots in disguise. You could take off the Tranformers graphic and put Titanfall on it and it would work.

    transformers-age-of-extinction-imax-poster

    TV

    iZombie

    Rose McIver has been cast as Liv, the lead character in The CW’s show based on the DC/Vertigo comic. Gwen is the character’s name in the comic so who knows about the name change. I read Volume 1 of the comic a couple of years ago and found it entertaining. It does lend itself well to a TV show.

    The Big Bang Theory

    Sheldon, Penny, Leonard and the rest of the gang will be around for at least a decade. CBS has renewed The Big Bang Theory for three more seasons taking it through season ten. I will never complain about more Bernadette.

    Video Games

    Mario

    Mario will be invading Happy Meals at McDonald’s in March and April. For those adults (me) that will be buying them, just remember they have double hamburger meals with them for us fatties. I got fat off of regular Happy Meals, I shudder to think how much larger I would be if I could have gotten double hamburgers in them when I was a kid.

    mario_mcdonalds

     

     

  • Is The Honest Trailer For Frozen Better Than The Movie?

    Full disclosure: I have not seen Frozen yet. Now don’t go getting your iced over panties in a bunch, I fully intend to, but I think watching the Honest Trailer before the movie was a mistake.

    A wonderful mistake.

    It will definitely affect the way I watch the movie now. Though, with someone as jaded as me, this is probably a good thing.