How about the True Detective opening involving the world’s greatest detective? Even the Yellow King doesn’t stand a chance.
I am now thinking of McConaughey, with handlebar mustache in full Batman garb, giving exposition on the need for villains to make heroes worthwhile.
Alright, alright, alright.
“Because when I beat Daniel Bryan at WrestleMania, the triple threat match will be Batista vs. Randy Orton vs…me.”
And just like that the main event at WrestleMania scares the shit out of us again.
Yep, we all knew HHH would some way get into all this world title brouhaha like a child that sees something he wants in another kids hand.
Mine! Mine!
I really don’t think we are headed in that direction. This is, most likely, a move to make Bryan’s match with HHH mean more. Because, after last week, when it was announced that Bryan would be in the main event if he beat the COO, it has been thought of as a certainty he is getting there. At least with this new stipulation it adds a bit of doubt into people’s minds.
Side Note: Stephanie McMahon’s fingers are rather bony. I imagine hand jobs from her are a painful affair like the Wicked Witch of the West handling your johnson.
Week after week I am looking forward to the Cena/Wyatt match. Last night was another stellar mic performance as Wyatt was decked out in Cena’s attire talking about his “plastic girlfriend”. I know I say it week after week, but there is no one that can touch him promo-wise right now. The character would fail in anyone else’s hands. It does worry me a bit that, since they are making this all about Cena’s “legacy”, it is almost a guarantee he will be getting the win.
Right now in Wyatt’s career maybe a good showing against Cena is all he needs.
My brain is scattershot this morning (like every morning), so now I will bring up the opening of the show. This was the first interaction between Batista and Randy Orton I have enjoyed since Capt. Skinnyjeans McNavaltattoo came back. HHH being in the mix helped and I can’t deny it is fun having Evolution in the ring a decade later.
Promos are always better when “real life” is mentioned. Orton bringing up no one wanting Batista back or HHH saying he is tired of “Hollywood stars” coming back and thinking they know more about the business than him hit the mark. Anyone else think that was a tiny jab at The Rock?
After last week’s Smackdown it looked like The Shield were beginning a face turn with their attack on Kane. Well, we can file that under “The Shield are faces officially”. You bring in Jerry Lawler, the fan favorite, and have Kane tell them to attack him and things don’t go as planned.
Three cheers for The Shield as good guys!
Of course this throws a big ole monkey wrench in my idea for a triple threat Shield match at WrestleMania. A face turn could work…for a short time. The Shield is one of those groups that works better as heels. It is cool to like them because the fans aren’t supposed to.
I am thinking this could be a short term bit with Ambrose and Rollins turning on Reigns or some kind of variation of that.
The Real Americans have gone from imploding to beating the tag champs in one week. That is some TNA quick-moving shit. Guessing this takes them to a title match before or at WrestleMania where they will lose and do the whole break-up thing where they awkwardly see each other in the hallways and try not to make eye contact before things simmer down and they open a small dialogue of “hey’s” and “how’s it going’s” before having intense make-up sex in a janitor’s closet only to break it off again a few weeks later.
Or maybe that was Scrubs.
Who’s that? That is the kid (man) that played Walt on Lost. Da fuuuuuuuuuq?
I began to wonder if the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal would get put on the WrestleMania pre-show, but with the names filling out the roster there is no way of that happening. Sheamus, Alberto Del Rio, Dolph Ziggler, Big Show, Christian, Mark Henry just to name a few will be in it so I am calling this as a mid-show breather between big matches.
A Goldust/Fandango match normally wouldn’t be news, but did anyone else notice the look of death Goldy gave to Fandango after the match. It looked like he hurt himself right before the finish and did not like how the ending went down. Cody had to actively calm him down in the ring…and Goldust won the match. I would not want to be Fandango when he got backstage.
It looks like AJ’s run as champion is coming to an end soon. Naomi is back from her eye injury with a bedazzled eye patch looking like one of Jean-Pierre Lafitte’s bar wenches. She beat AJ last night then AJ took out her frustrations on Tamina who wasn’t having it.
Anyone else notice how AJ’s push, or TV time even, has gone way down since Punk left. You wouldn’t think WWE would hold grudges just because she is dating him…right?
As we move closer to WrestleMania, does anyone else have growing concerns on if the WWE Network can handle the server load? It has been working fine for me after the first few days of hiccups, but there has not really been an event the size of Mania watched live by millions of people.
Let’s hope this doesn’t become a Halloween Havok moment where the show cuts out during the main event. I don’t think Goldberg or DDP would like that.
For me and mine, we will be having a party and watching on an Xbox 360, yet I will be bringing my PS3 as a backup in case there are problems with the 360 in some way. Still, if there are server issues, it won’t matter what system we have.
What are we going to do? Talk to each other?
Till next week!
Snaaaaaaaaaake!
I couldn’t resist. I apologize.
Today is the release of the uber-demo Metal Gear Solid V: Ground Zeroes which leads into the full game, Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain. While the game’s length may have been a point of contention for fans, the reviews suggest that the fun you will have should outweigh any reservations you had about playtime.
Except Polygon, of course.
IGN– 8/10
“Ground Zeroes is so adept at generating tension that at times it felt like I was playing a survival horror game. While Boss has never been more flexible; able to roll and jump and shoot in line with today’s top third-person action-adventure games, enemies are smart and plentiful. In the harsh light of day – and played on Hard mode – they possess cruel 20/20 vision, and react to every little movement or shifting shadow by becoming more efficacious in their patrolling.”
Kotaku– YES
“Shortly after beginning the game, I spent a good thirty minutes just making my way back and forth between two buildings, knocking out guards, seeing how long it would take them to wake back up, trying to distract them and see how close I could get to them before they noticed me. If you’re into that sort of experimentation, you’ll find a rewarding chemistry set in Ground Zeroes.”
Polygon– 5.5/10
“All told, the titular Ground Zeroes mission took me one hour and 16 minutes to complete, including cutscenes and about eight deaths. That’s not the game clock, either. That’s real time. The mission is not only short, it’s dull. Your objectives amount to going to one place, rescuing a prisoner, going to another place, rescuing another prisoner, and then calling in a helicopter to get you out of there. Underwhelming doesn’t begin to describe it.”
Videogamer– 8/10
“It’s flexible enough to enable players to come up with their own battle plans, and once Ground Zeroes is over there are five Side Ops missions (encompassing assassination, hostage extraction, espionage and more) that take place at different times of day. Again, it shows off the pliability of the world, while also giving the lighting engine a good run out. It’s literally not found wanting come rain or shine.”
Game Informer– 7/10
“Ground Zeroes makes a fantastic first impression. It is gorgeous, from the facial capture to the environmental textures. Even the little touches, like lens flare and particle effects, are impeccable. The camera angles are cool, the art direction is interesting, and the production values are high. Snake’s mission in the prison camp is undoubtedly a feast for the eyes, but if you want meaningful content, you’re going to leave hungry.”
Joystiq– 3.5/5
“The longer you stay with Ground Zeroes and its shooter-style control scheme (for real, this time), the more you diverge from your old style of play, even if your intent is to be more of a ghost than a ghost-making machine. On one end of the Metal Gear spectrum, you drag a squirming guard behind a building and choke him into mandatory silence. On the other end, you commandeer a giant emplaced machine gun – let’s call it the “on-site procurement” that’s been encouraged since MGS1 – and blow everyone away. Metal Gear Solid 5: Ground Zeroes rewards stealth purists with a better score, but trigger-happy improvisers get a satisfying body count.”
Here are the quick hits from the world of movies, TV, games, blacksmithing, hummus, whatever catches our fancy.
Pixar
The Incredibles and Ratatouille will be converted to 3D for future re-release in theaters. Never cared for Ratatouille that much, but I will gladly pay handsomely to see Frozone in 3D.
The Amazing Spider-Man
Marc Webb will not be returning to direct The Amazing Spider-Man 4 (yes, 4). Ease up there Sony, Spider-Man is not The Avengers. Let’s not get too far ahead of ourselves.
Wolverine
James Mangold will begin work on the follow-up to The Wolverine after X-Men: Apocalypse releases in 2016. With Hugh Jackman recently saying his tenure as the adamantium man is winding down, I can see this being his final hoorah as Wolvie.
Maleficent
Here is a new banner for Maleficent starring Angelina Jolie. This time she has wings. She gained horns last poster. Slowly they are just revealing she is Satan incarnate before the movie opens.
American Horror Story
Writer Douglas Petrie has revealed that the fourth season of the horror anthology show will have a carnival theme in the 1950’s. As fu**ed up as AHS is, this is the perfect setting. Plus, I miss Carnivale and this will fill a need.
The Walking Dead
Anyone get traumatized by last night’s episode “The Grove”? If you are a comic fan, you are used to this, I want to know the soccer mom reaction.
Gauntlet
The classic dungeon-crawler is getting a reboot this summer by WB Games. Check out the trailer below and remember the times wasting too much money on the arcade machine in a Mexican restaurant. Maybe that is just me.
Watch Dogs
Ubisoft is saying that it will take average players between 35-40 hours to complete the story with some free-roaming while completing the entire game could be around 100 hours. That is worth $60 if true.
Poor Jesse. Without Walter everything is falling apart.
Need For Speed was expected to finish first this past weekend, but had to settle for a disappointing third place with $17.8 million. A new Fast & Furious franchise this is not.
300: Rise of an Empire held strong in its second weekend even though it lost its top spot to Mr. Peabody & Sherman. The CGI dog and kid combo brought in $21.2 million.
Veronica Mars cracked the top ten with $2 million playing in under 400 theaters. Nice job, marshmallows.
1. Mr. Peabody & Sherman- $21.2 million/ $63.2 million
2. 300: Rise of an Empire- $19.1/ $78.3
3. Need For Speed- $17.8/ $17.8
4. Non-Stop- $10.6/ $68.8
5. The Single Moms Club- $8.3/ $8.3
6. The LEGO Movie- $7.7/ $236.9
7. Son of God- $5.4/ $50.9
8. The Grand Budapest Hotel- $3.6/ $4.8
9. Frozen- $2.1/ $396.4
10. Veronica Mars- $2.0/ $2.0
Here are the quick hits from the world of movies, TV, games, K-Mart locations, laserdisc collections, whatever catches our fancy.
Avengers: Age of Ultron
Marvel Studios president Kevin Feige says we can look forward to Hawkeye and Hulk having larger roles in the sequel. This pleases me.
“Part of the fun of Age of Ultron was saying, you’ve seen another Iron Man adventure before, you see another Thor adventure and another Cap adventure, but we haven’t seen the Green Goliath again. So that was important in the characters you haven’t seen – Hulk being one of them and Hawkeye being one of them – Ultron will make up for it. They have very big parts in Age of Ultron.”
Pan
In the long, successful tradition of actors playing characters of different ethnicity, like Johnny Depp in The Lone Ranger or Al Jolson in The Jazz Singer, Rooney Mara (The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo) has been cast as Tiger Lily in 2015’s Pan. This movie sounds like a scene out of Dragon Tattoo…very uncomfortable to sit through.
Captain America: The Winter Soldier
Sebastian Stan has revealed that he has a nine picture deal with Marvel Studios. Get ready for Winter Soldier to be around for a long time.
Arnold Schwarzenegger
Watching Arnold crush things with a tank is somehow deeply satisfying. He is doing it for charity as well, so no shame in helping out.
Titanfall
Amazon raised Prime prices this week and now they have been caught deleting low scores for Titanfall by NeoGAF. Ruh Roh, Shaggy.
Valve
Check out the redesigned Steam controller which still looks weird as hell, but now with A,B,X and Y buttons.
Street Fighter
Street Fighter: Assassin’s Fist, an original web series, will debut on Machinima. It can’t be any worse than the last two movies…can it? At least the video has no Van Damme or Kristin Kreuk although it looks like the grand master is wearing one hell of an anal bead necklace.
http://youtu.be/GYjIT-HALrY
Harry Potter
JK Rowling has released a new 2,400 word piece called History of the Quidditch World Cup. It is free and can be read on Pottermore.
When it was announced that Batman vs. Superman had been delayed to May 6, 2016 we knew that was a date that Marvel had already staked out for an unknown film. Through the power of the internet we now know that it will be Captain America who gets to honor to take on DC’s two mightiest heroes.
While superhero battles are great in the comics, it sucks for movie fans. Now, your uber-fans are going to see both in the same weekend, but with theater trips costing your first-born son these days, there will have to be a choice made for most. I hope that one studio backs off and changes dates because both of these movies are large enough that they need to have their own weekend in the spotlight.
If I had to play the guessing game as to who would flinch first, it would be Marvel. Captain America is a big property, of this there is no doubt, yet, he is not on the same level as Iron Man or Avengers (at least in the Marvel cinematic universe).
If these two movies do open against each other I would have to give the edge to Batman and Superman. This will be the third Cap film up against the two biggest comic characters in history. Even with all the bitching about Batfleck (even though I think he will own it), there will be a curiosity by moviegoers to see how the first movie team-up goes with the Man of Steel and the Dark Knight.
If both movies open on the same weekend which one will you be seeing first?
Don’t worry PS4 owners. While Xbox One is enjoying the release of Titanfall this week you are only a week away from Infamous: Second Son. While it is nothing like Titanfall, it is good to have an exclusive title to enjoy.
Check out this video just released that shows eight minutes of gameplay from the third game in the series. If you have played the first two games it will look very familiar and very pretty as new hero Delsin makes his way around Seattle.
Infamous: Second Son releases on March 21st.
Pete Holmes has already taken Ryu to task about the new standards and practices for Street Fighter, now he has to do the same for Chun-Li.
Let’s just all accept that growing up playing Street Fighter we did not always pick Chun-Li because of her fighting skills, but because of her short skirt, long legs and her need to do many split-legged attacks.
God, that Street Fighter movie was straight from the devil’s taint. Sorry, random thought.
Here are the quick hits from the world of movies, TV, video games, air fresheners, bowling shoes, whatever catches our fancy.
Fletch
Jason Sudeikis is in talks to take over the role of Irwin M. Fletcher in Warner’s reboot of the Fletch franchise. Chevy Chase played the role twice (perfectly) in Fletch and Fletch Lives. Go back and watch them and realize that Sudeikis will own this role.
Fantastic Four
It seems the hunt for Doctor Doom has been narrowed to four actors. They are Toby Kebbell, Sam Riley, Eddie Redmayne and Domhnall Gleeson. Never heard of them? Good. I think more unknowns should get some of these comic roles going around.
The LEGO Movie
Chris McKay has been picked to direct The LEGO Movie 2. Phil Lord and Chris Miller, the directors of the first movie, will return as producers. McKay has directed Adult Swim shows Moral Oral and Robot Chicken. Let’s get Seth Green involved and everything will be awesome.
Transformers: Age of Extinction
A new IMAX poster has just been released for the robots in disguise. You could take off the Tranformers graphic and put Titanfall on it and it would work.
iZombie
Rose McIver has been cast as Liv, the lead character in The CW’s show based on the DC/Vertigo comic. Gwen is the character’s name in the comic so who knows about the name change. I read Volume 1 of the comic a couple of years ago and found it entertaining. It does lend itself well to a TV show.
The Big Bang Theory
Sheldon, Penny, Leonard and the rest of the gang will be around for at least a decade. CBS has renewed The Big Bang Theory for three more seasons taking it through season ten. I will never complain about more Bernadette.
Mario
Mario will be invading Happy Meals at McDonald’s in March and April. For those adults (me) that will be buying them, just remember they have double hamburger meals with them for us fatties. I got fat off of regular Happy Meals, I shudder to think how much larger I would be if I could have gotten double hamburgers in them when I was a kid.
