You don’t need an Honest Trailer to tell you that Transformers: Age of Extinction was bad, but it can offer some relief for anyone who spent real money to see this piece of sh**.
I was waiting until I could Redbox this for a dollar to at least see how ugly it could be, though I can’t even do that now with the parts of the movie I have seen beforehand. I have spent nine hours watching the first three movies. I could have used that time so much better. Having root canals, pulling out my nose hairs one by one until I cry, trust falling off a building praying the concrete is fluffy.
Here are the quick hits from the world of movies, TV, video games, air fresheners, bowling shoes, whatever catches our fancy.
Movies
Fletch
Jason Sudeikis is in talks to take over the role of Irwin M. Fletcher in Warner’s reboot of the Fletch franchise. Chevy Chase played the role twice (perfectly) in Fletch and Fletch Lives. Go back and watch them and realize that Sudeikis will own this role.
Fantastic Four
It seems the hunt for Doctor Doom has been narrowed to four actors. They are Toby Kebbell, Sam Riley, Eddie Redmayne and Domhnall Gleeson. Never heard of them? Good. I think more unknowns should get some of these comic roles going around.
The LEGO Movie
Chris McKay has been picked to direct The LEGO Movie 2. Phil Lord and Chris Miller, the directors of the first movie, will return as producers. McKay has directed Adult Swim shows Moral Oral and Robot Chicken. Let’s get Seth Green involved and everything will be awesome.
Transformers: Age of Extinction
A new IMAX poster has just been released for the robots in disguise. You could take off the Tranformers graphic and put Titanfall on it and it would work.
TV
iZombie
Rose McIver has been cast as Liv, the lead character in The CW’s show based on the DC/Vertigo comic. Gwen is the character’s name in the comic so who knows about the name change. I read Volume 1 of the comic a couple of years ago and found it entertaining. It does lend itself well to a TV show.
The Big Bang Theory
Sheldon, Penny, Leonard and the rest of the gang will be around for at least a decade. CBS has renewed The Big Bang Theory for three more seasons taking it through season ten. I will never complain about more Bernadette.
Video Games
Mario
Mario will be invading Happy Meals at McDonald’s in March and April. For those adults (me) that will be buying them, just remember they have double hamburger meals with them for us fatties. I got fat off of regular Happy Meals, I shudder to think how much larger I would be if I could have gotten double hamburgers in them when I was a kid.
Chris Evans may take a break from acting after his Marvel contract is up.
“I think when I’m done with this Marvel contract, I’ll take a little break from acting,with acting, you’re one piece in a very big puzzle. It’s like you helped buy a gift but you don’t know what the gift is, so you come back and see the movie. Sometimes it’s nice, sometimes it’s tragic. This process [directing], you’re involved in every single decision. If I hadn’t done it, I’d be really kicking myself. At the time, it was a daunting task for a number of reasons, but in hindsight it was the right move.”
Transformers: Age of Extinction
Here is a new poster with Mark Wahlberg holding either a fancy ass gun or a prop sword from the World of Warcraft movie he found laying around and decided “what the hell”.
TV
The Walking Dead
For the first time since the plodding Season 2, an episode of The Walking Dead bored me. The name of the episode should have been a warning; it was titled “Still”.
Rob Zombie
The rocker/director is developing a limited series based on the Charles Manson murders on Fox. The series will “tell converging stories of people and events leading up to and after the murders, from shifting points of view.” Everything about this seems like a win.
Late Night with Seth Meyers
Ian McKellan and Patrick Stewart are the kings of Twitter and they are now the kings of late night after taking over Late Night this past Friday.
http://youtu.be/5J_tk25AYVQ
Games
Mass Effect
Bioware has stated that they have discussed releasing a remastered Mass Effect Trilogy for the Playstation 4 and Xbox One. I approve of this. If they can make it as good as the recently released Tomb Raider: Definitive Edition, I will gladly play through them again.
3DS
Nintendo will release a Yoshi-themed 3DS XL on March 14th for $199.99. Yoshi can be manly. I may get it…shut the fuck up.
Toys
Superman
Sideshow Collectibles is making a Premium Format Figure featuring the once and always Superman, Christopher Reeve. Check out the sneak peek.
Michael Bay’s fourth Transformers movie will be called Transformers: Age of Extinction. The new poster even says as much right up there. By the look of it, the Transformers will travel to Tatooine and try to pod race in Mos Eisley with their new racist Mexican robots and it will make a billion dollars and Michael Bay will sit back, collect his money and maniacal laugh.
I have been burned by the Transformers movies before and can honestly say the only way I would ever give it a chance again would be if Dinobots were in it.
Kelsey Grammar has joined the cast of Transformers 4 as the main villain specializing in counter-intelligence. This is not Grammar’s first go round with a big movie franchise having played Beast (rather well) in Brett Ratner’s attempt to kill the X-Men franchise, X-Men: The Last Stand. He also played the villainous douche rather well on the Starz series Boss.
Don’t think I don’t see what Michael Bay is doing here. After three TF flicks with Shia the Beef and Megan Fox, he is attempting to have actual actors be in the next entry to make people (like me) think that things are changing for the franchise.
Guillermo Del Toro’s Pacific Rim is one of the best looking movies of the summer and if people ask me to describe the movie to them I will simply say this:
Imagine the creatures are Decepticons and it is how Transformers should have been.
A new poster has just been released and I would assume it will be the first in a series of single robot posters. This first one features one called Coyote Tango who is set in Japan. Just remember to say domo arigato, Mr. Roboto when he saves your ass.
In case you missed the trailer for the robots punch shit flick, check it out below.
Co-creator of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Peter Laird, took to his blog to give his opinion about the casting of Megan Fox as April O’Neil in Michael Bay’s version bastardization of everyone’s favorite heroes on the half shell.
“My only exposure to Megan Fox as an actress is through her role in two Transformers movies and the wretched (but happily forgettable) Jennifer’s Body. It may not be fair to judge her range of acting skills just from those three movies, but I think it is safe to say that there are probably hundreds of better choices for the role of April O’Neil. Of course, her name has promotional value, and maybe that’s what they want. Who knows? I can’t get myself too worked up about it.”
In other words, he said in the nicest way possible that Megan Fox sucks. She sucked in Transformers and she sucks so bad that he doesn’t want her in a movie where all she has to do is wear yellow and talk to fake, CGI alien, non-ninja turtle like creatures that like to blow stuff up excessively. It’s Michael Bay, you know I am right.
When asked for response, Megan Fox had this to say.
24 Titles Announced For Day One Of Nintendo’s New Console.
For everyone that was lucky enough to get a Wii U pre-ordered a few weeks back the only question left was which games would be available on launch day so you could decide what you want to pick up with your system. Today Nintendo announced a 24 title lineup that has a little bit of everything for everybody. From Mario to Call of Duty to Tekken, Nintendo seems to have all the different age groups and game types covered for the November 18th launch.
Take a look at the list below and let us know what games will you be picking up when you pick up your Wii U.
