Steam Controller Unveiled. Valve Takes On Virtual Boy For Worst Controller Design Ever

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It has been a big week for Valve. They teased three big announcements for this week and have so far delivered Steam OS and that the mysterious Steam Box would be coming next year as they try to revolutionize the relationship of PC and living room TV gaming. I have not focused on these announcements because…well I am not a PC gamer and probably will never be. Just being honest.

But this is something different. Because..well…look at it!

It is the official Steam controller which features two circle trackpads as opposed to analog sticks. Valve says that they will offer unparalleled control and as Valve stated will make, “whole genres of games that were previously only playable with a keyboard and mouse” easier to play on a TV. ” The trackpads can be used as buttons also and will also have a feedback system.

There is a touchpad in the middle of the controller which can be used in many different ways including scrolling through pages of information and also can be a clickable button.

I do not play mobile games on my phone for a reason. I do not like touchscreen control pads. Now I know this is not the exact same thing, but I have to have tactile contact. I want to feel an analog stick moving in the direction I want it to. Those trackpads may be amazing, who knows. I will never get used to gaming like that though.

OK, those are the basics. I know there are some long-winded explanations of every function this controller carries, but I have to get on with the simple fact that this thing is plain, fu**ing ugly. There will some Valve lovers that will jump down my throat because everything Valve does is a revolution or whatever, but come on. Be realistic. This thing is Virtual Boy ugly.

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It is like looking at a Steam controller in reverse.

Of course, there is still the Gamecube controller out there with its hanging blue balls.

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And one can never forget the Jaguar controller. I know my hands never will. Long nights of Aliens vs. Predator and hands cramps…the hand cramps. Never forget.

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