Tag: Wrestlemania

  • Fat Guy In A Little Singlet- Raw Recap February 3, 2014

    The first Raw after CM Punk’s departure went about as well as the WWE could have expected. Sure there were plenty of Punk chants throughout the night and reports that Punk posters were being confiscated like at the NXT taping last week, but the show wasn’t a huge barreling train that headed off the rails and took a plane back to Chicago.

    punk

    Piece of advice to live fans- if you want to keep up appearances that Daniel Bryan is your guy, you may not want to chant for Punk during his main event match with the WWE All-World Marine All-Star Champion. It just proves to the WWE that you are chanting to chant and actually don’t care about what you say you care about…like Fandango.

    Unlike last week there were some really good matches including The Shield doing their Shield-y thing in a six-man tag against Dominic’s real father, the West African Jamaican and man boobs. I am glad the crowd made the fact that Roman Reigns and Big E. were in the ring together a big deal. Few things matter in the ring anymore so it is nice when two big hulking men go against each other and the crowd oohs and ahhs. Kind of like the daydreams that Vince rubs one out to.

    stink robocop

    Back to Punk, because I am like a dog with too many chew toys.

    Word is that Vince and HHH are split on what to do with the tattooed one. Vince wants him back in a big way and HHH feels the opposite because Punk didn’t feel like their match at WrestleMania 30 was high profile enough for him so mutton chops is butthurt.

    News Flash: It isn’t as high a profile match as HHH wants to believe it is. There is a hierarchy to Mania matches.

    1. WWE Title matches

    2. Undertaker vs. whoever.

    3. Whatever else is on the show

    4. 1&2 are swappable

    Punk has always wanted to main event Mania and he felt he was wasting another showing with a match against HHH. Maybe he shouldn’t have left so soon, maybe he just couldn’t take anymore, who knows? I do know that I would love to see Punk on TV again but only if he wants to. No use watching someone half-ass their way through something. That would be like watching Total Divas.

    wm20

    With Punk hanging out with Chris Hardwick or something it seems like WWE has taken the easiest possible way out. By easiest way out I literally mean they took the script for Mania and went HHH vs. Punk Bryan. Kane interfered in the main event last night because…because. So now it looks like D.B. will be taking on Korporate Kane at Elimination Chamber before getting Punk’s Mania leftovers.

    Yay?

    You know who should be pissed about all of this going down is Sheamus. He was rumored to be turning heel against Bryan and have a Mania match with him but now that has changed and it looks like he will be calling 1-800-FELLA on Ryback.

    data

    Welcome back! Don’t get pink eye.

    People backstage need to remind Cody Rhodes that if he is going to try and pull a Kurt Angle in the ring at least save it for a PPV. Paralysis should not be given away for free. At least get my $10 on the WWE Network before doing that again.

    But I do thank him for the effort. The Rhodes Brothers basically played the role of every John Cena opponent for the last decade. They worked their asses off in the cage match and carried the Outlaws then had to take the loss. Looks more and more likely of a brother vs. brother match at Mania.

    Photo courtesy wwe.com
    Photo courtesy wwe.com

    Brock Lesnar was not at Raw last night so that meant that Batista had to have some mic work with Alberto Del Rio. Sad part about this? Del Rio actually outdid skinny jeans even with all of his Spanglish. It was a tougher sounding Del Rio and his sucker punch on Bootista was a surprise that made him look like an actual threat and not a chickenshit. Where was this Del Rio during his last title reign?

    Did anyone else know that Titus O’Neil broke up with Darren Young? That’s what I get for not watching Smackdown…or caring about Titus O’Neil. I did like The Miz coming out during the match and asking why he was not in a match but the “guy who barks like a dog” and the “guy who made his own belt for the internet” did. People give Miz a lot of shit but I am still a fan. Hard to believe its been three years since this:

    Photo courtesy ign.com
    Photo courtesy ign.com

    Let’s see what the possible, reworked if Punk is not coming back, I am just guessing so don’t hold me to it WrestleMania 30 card looks like.

    Randy Orton vs. Batista

    HHH vs. Daniel Bryan

    Bray Wyatt vs. John Cena

    Cody Rhodes vs. Goldust

    Sheamus vs. Ryback

    Triple-threat match with all three Shield members

    Undertaker vs. Brock Lesnar

    On paper it looks good. Then again, so did WrestleMania 26 and that went down the crapper quickly.

    I don’t believe we have ever been this close to WrestleMania where so much was up in the air. Now with Punk (maybe) gone for good I am sure the writers’ pants are quite full with the proverbial dookie.

    Side note- Green Day’s “Dookie” is 20 years old now. Go fu** yourself time.

    Till next week!

    kenneth

     

     

     

     

     

     

  • CM Punk Leaves WWE

    Punk

    When it rains, it pours.

    After Sunday’s Royal Rumble where fans took over the show (props again to Pittsburgh) showing their displeasure for Daniel Bryan’s omission from the match, reports are saying that CM Punk has left the company. He reportedly told Vince McMahon on Monday that he was going home and got on a plane to Chicago. He has been taken off the listed talent for all house shows for the next few weeks.

    There is no way to really tell if this is a work or the real deal but with Punk’s past frustrations I am pegging it as being on the up and up.

    The reason behind his leaving is pure speculation at this point. It could simply be he wants time off and he is more of a two minute notice guy instead of two weeks.

    Maybe he just wanted to film more Grammar Slam.

    Rumors also say it could be because of “returning talent” getting the bigger spots at WrestleMania over guys that have been there for years. He voiced his concerns about this when The Rock returned a few years ago.

    This is the LAST thing the WWE needs at this point. Fans are already nearing a revolt because of Daniel Bryan and now they lose the second largest face on their roster. At this rate that Sting signing better be real because the 30th anniversary of WrestleMania is looking in worse shape than ever.

  • Fat Guy In A Little Singlet- Raw Recap 1/27/14

    Photo courtesy wwe.com
    Photo courtesy wwe.com

    It’s amazing how much you can relate everything to high school. Take the picture above. You have the douche nozzle that uses his looks to bang all the women, then when they break up, shits in their duffle bag. The football jock who can dress however he wants and is “tough”. Then you have the wildcard. That person that is legit fucking crazy and is most likely to beat someone to death with a pipe in the gym basement.

    That’s what Brock Lesnar is: a wildcard.

    wildcard

    There is a reason they pay Brock all that money. It’s not to talk about diverticulitis awareness. He saved that horrible segment last night between Orton and Batista that had the crowd so excited they chanted “Daniel Bryan”. Granted the masses chanted that most of the night…but not when the bane of Shane Carwin came out.

    Brock still has that aura around him that somebody is going to get a shoe up their ass and a Turkey Tom stuffed down their throat when he is in the ring.

    Last night’s three-way bitchfest has me thinking more and more that there are three possibilities for WrestleMania: Brock vs. Batista, Brock vs. Batista vs. Orton or a fatal four-way adding in Daniel Bryan.

    I know, it is still wishful thinking. After last night it seems that the WWE is relishing in the fact they are dangling Bryan so close to the main event and will jerk him back like they are teaching us a lesson. We are the children and HHH is the horrible father that tells us to touch the stove because it’s not hot, but that bitch is on full heat.

    BTW, who absolutely LOVED the way HHH talked to the crowd in the same voice I am sure he uses when his spoiled ass kids want something? I can imagine in the pre-production meaning how it was discussed:

    Writers- What if they start chanting for Daniel Bryan.

    HHH- Don’t worry. I have handle these little diaper shitters before. I can handle it.

    Writers- But sir, these aren’t childr….

    HHH- Get in the corner! Time out!

    seinfeld

    I am not complaining about the show itself. In the realms of recent Raw’s it was a decent episode. The main event was the only match to really get interested in when it all comes down to it. I liked the stipulation for the six-man tag with the winning team going to the Elimination Chamber although I don’t get the Wyatt’s attacking Cena therefore giving him an easy in to the match. Wouldn’t their plan be to thwart Magilla Gorilla from making it in? Logic…the wrestling fans Achilles heel.

    The Elimination Chamber now has four official members; Sheamus, Cena, Orton and Bryan with Lesnar being a pretty good bet for #5. Now the mystery begins. Who will be the last entrant? If I am wagering money I would say it will be Bray Wyatt. I don’t know how but it solves a lot of WWE storytelling in one match.

    If it ends up being those six that is one LOADED match. I would watch the shit out of that match especially with Lesnar being in his hometown.

    If you were looking for more great matches, this was not the night for you. The Miz and Dolph Ziggler had an OK showing in the first ever (?) Battle of Cleveland with the winner getting to have sex with Drew Carey.

    Photo courtesy wwe.com
    Photo courtesy wwe.com

    WILDCARD!!!!

    Lesnar destroyed ex-mustache and Black Reign then proceeded to “Big Show” them with a chair. Love him or hate him, he is the only guy on that show that would truly make me shit my pants if he came at me.

    A.J. lost ANOTHER match! This time to the other Funkadactyl. The shitty one! Just give us the A.J. vs. Emma match already!

    Big congrats to Jake “The Snake” Roberts on his Hall of Fame induction. He should have been in with one of the first two or three classes but he was on a downward spiral then. Now that he has cleaned up his life it is now time to take his place where he belongs. During his heyday there was no better wrestler on the mic or knew how to sell the crowd on mind games and ring psychology.

    Jake-Roberts-2

    I will cover the rest of the matches quickly.

    America is better than Mexico. Don’t get mad, the WWE said it.

    Thug life is better than ballroom dancing.

    Being related to The Rock is better than being Ryback (obviously).

    Mexico is better than Jamaica…or is it West Africa. Hell, I don’t know. Kofi lost.

    Going back to the upcoming PPV, the WWE may be doing the fans a “service” by having Daniel Bryan in the match but will the audience accept anything other than a Bryan victory or Brock since it will be in his backyard?

    I want to believe the WWE is smarter than we give them credit for. That they are letting all of this fan uprising fester for a huge payoff at WrestleMania 30. I said I want to believe because I agree with one of my good friends who believes they are staying the course, no matter what, only focused on the WWE Network and new television deal.

    Unless one of you want to climb a mountain and ask some naked oracle like in 300 we will just sit and wait. As much as I love titties, I am fat and I am not climbing a damn thing.

    Oh well, at least I have a new Blacklist to watch.

    Until next week!

    LEGO BOMB!

    LEGO BOMB!!!

     

  • All 30 Years Of Wrestlemania Matches Revealed For WWE 2K14

    Photo courtesy polygon.com
    Photo courtesy polygon.com

    2K Sports is putting the finishing touches on their first WWE game, WWE 2K14. Don’t worry about too much of a drastic change because the game is still being developed by Yuke’s, the team behind previous WWE games with THQ. This year’s story mode will celebrate the 30th anniversary of WrestleMania by having you relive 45 matches from wrestling’s biggest show. 2K has been unveiling the matches by the different eras they took place in and now we have the complete list for you to look at.

    I hope you like wrestling as John Cena because he has nine matches on the list, the most of any other superstar. The Undertaker and Hulk Hogan both have seven, HHH and HBK each have six and Stone Cold has four.

    Have a look a the matches and let us know if there are any you would have added or some that should not have been on this list.

    [amazon_link id=”B00CMC6HCY” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]WWE 2K14[/amazon_link] releases on October 29th.

    Hulkamania Runs Wild

    -WrestleMania: André the Giant vs. Big John Studd

    -WrestleMania 2: Hulk Hogan vs. King Kong Bundy

    -WrestleMania III: Ricky the Dragon Steamboat vs. Macho Man Randy Savage (with Miss Elizabeth)

    -WrestleMania III: Hulk Hogan vs. André the Giant (with Bobby Heenan)

    -WrestleMania IV: Randy Savage (with Miss Elizabeth and Hulk Hogan) vs.Ted DiBiase (with André the Giant)

    -WrestleMania V: Randy Savage vs. Hulk Hogan

    -WrestleMania VI: The Ultimate Warrior (Intercontinental Champion) vs. Hulk Hogan (WWF Champion)

    -WrestleMania VII: Hulk Hogan vs. Sgt. Slaughter

    -WrestleMania VIII: Randy Savage (with Miss Elizabeth) vs. Ric Flair (with Mr. Perfect)

    -WrestleMania IX: Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna (with Mr. Fuji)

    -Hulk Hogan vs.Yokozuna (immediately after the match)

    The New Generation

    -WrestleMania 10: HBK vs. Razor Ramon Intercontinental Championship Ladder Match

    -WrestleMania 10: Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna (c) (with Mr. Fuji)

    -WrestleMania 11: The Undertaker (with Paul Bearer) vs. King Kong Bundy (with Ted DiBiase)

    -WrestleMania 11: Diesel vs. HBK

    -WrestleMania 12: The Undertaker (with Paul Bearer) vs. Diesel

    -WrestleMania 12: Bret Hart (c) vs. Shawn Michaels

    -WrestleMania 13: Bret Hart vs. Steve Austin

    The Attitude Era

    -WrestleMania 14: The Undertaker vs. Kane (with Paul Bearer)

    -WrestleMania 15: The Rock (c) vs. Steve Austin

    -WrestleMania 16: Triple H (c) vs. The Rock vs. Big Show vs. Mick Foley

    -WrestleMania 17: The Rock (c) vs. Steve Austin

    Ruthless Aggression

    -WrestleMania 18: The Rock vs. Hollywood Hogan

    -WrestleMania 18: Chris Jericho (c) vs. Triple H

    -WrestleMania 19: HBK vs. Chris Jericho

    -WrestleMania 19: The Rock vs. Stone Cold Steve Austin

    -WrestleMania 20: John Cena vs. The Big Show

    -WrestleMania 20: Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

    -WrestleMania 21: John “Bradshaw” Layfield  vs. John Cena

    -WrestleMania 22: Edge w/Lita vs. Mick Foley

    -WrestleMania 23: Batista (c) vs. The Undertaker

    -WrestleMania 23: John Cena (c) vs. Shawn Michaels

    -WrestleMania 24: HBK vs. Ric Flair

    -WrestleMania 24: Randy Orton (c) vs. John Cena vs. Triple H

    The Universe Era

    -WrestleMania 25: Edge (c) vs. John Cena vs. Big Show

    -WrestleMania 25: Triple H (c) vs. Randy Orton

    -WrestleMania 26: Chris Jericho (c) vs. Edge

    -WrestleMania 26: Batista (c) vs. John Cena

    -WrestleMania 26: The Undertaker vs. HBK

    -WrestleMania 27: Edge (c) vs. Alberto Del Rio

    -WrestleMania 27: The Miz (c) vs. John Cena

    -WrestleMania 28: The Undertaker vs. Triple H

    -WrestleMania 28: CM Punk vs. Jericho

    -WrestleMania 28: The Rock vs. John Cena

    -WrestleMania 29: Brock Lesnar vs. Triple H

    -WrestleMania 29: CM Punk vs. Undertaker

    -WrestleMania 29: The Rock vs. John Cena 2

     

     

     

  • WWE 2K14 Will Celebrate 30 Years Of Wrestlemania

    Photo courtesy cinemablend.com
    Photo courtesy cinemablend.com

    One of the biggest features of this years WWE 2K14 has been announced and to coincide with next years Wrestlemania 30, the game will let players recreate 45 matches spanning the thirty years that the “grandaddy of them all” has been in existence. I wondered how the guys at Yuke’s would be able to surpass WWE 13’s amazing Attitude Era mode and this certainly has gotten my hopes very high. Only three matches have been revealed for the game so far and they are:

    -Andre the Giant vs. Hulk Hogan (Wrestlemania 3)

    -The Rock vs. Hulk Hogan (Wrestlemania 18)

    -The Rock vs. John Cena (Wrestlemania 28)

    The full list of legends available in the game will be revealed this Saturday, August 17th at the Summerslam Axxess event. This should give us a good indication of some of the matches that will be included in the 30 Years of Wrestlemania mode.

    45 matches is good amount of content so I am hoping that the developers choose a good mixture of the classic and some off-the-wall stuff. Here are a few of my choices I would like to see when [amazon_link id=”B00CMC6HCY” target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]WWE 2K14[/amazon_link] releases on October 29th.

    -“Macho Man” Randy Savage vs. Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat (Wrestlemania 3)

    -Rick Rude vs. The Ultimate Warrior (Wrestlemania 5)

    -Razor Ramon vs. Shawn Michaels (Wrestlemania 10)

    -DDP vs. Christian (Wrestlemania 18)

    -The Undertaker vs. Ric Flair (Wrestlemania 18)

    -The Rock and Mick Foley vs. Evolution (Wrestlemania 20)

    -Shawn Michaels vs. The Undertaker (Wrestlemania 25)