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  • WWE Battleground 2014 Predictions

    Normally if the WWE tried to run two PPV’s a month I would ask what the big rush is for? Money in the Bank was earlier this month and we already have Battleground this Sunday with Summerslam two weeks after that. But with the WWE Network, they can do one every week for all I care. Ten bucks a month beats $55 a pop every single time.

    No, I don’t work for WWE although I could see why you would think that with my glowing endorsement of the network.

    The lead up to Battleground has been by the numbers like it is an afterthought of a PPV. The thing that WWE is failing to realize is that it is a better card than Money in the Bank a few weeks ago. Predictable, yes, but more for a wrestling fan to enjoy.

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    1. Naomi vs. Cameron

    Now I obviously wasn’t talking about this match when I said that last statement. No one gives any amount of fucks about this match besides Naomi, Cameron, their families and Brodus Clay who has to be wondering why these two have jobs and he doesn’t. It’s not the fact they have tits, Brodus had plenty of those.

    Winner- Naomi with a funktastic Funkadactyl finish. Whatever. Let’s move on.

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    2. Jack Swagger vs. Rusev

    The way you can tell if a character is over is by how quickly the audience accepts their opponents. The fact it took Jack Swagger’s music to hit during a Rusev promo to turn him face proves this. I like the slow build of Rusev. Instead of throwing him into the main event (to lose to Cena), they are moving him though the roster at a believable pace. When he does get a big time main event feud, he will be more believable as a threat (then lose to Cena).

    Winner- Rusev locks in The Accolade while I act like I am not staring at Lana’s breasts.

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    3. Seth Rollins vs. Dean Ambrose

    Don’t worry, Seth’s “injury” from Monday is clearly a work. The announcers made it too clear that he could have messed his knee up. This could be to even the playing field with Ambrose’s shoulder problems or just give Rollins an excuse for a loss. This should be a fun match which means it will get five minutes less than it needs.Seth got his big win at Money in the Bank, Ambrose should go over here. I would let this carry over to Summerslam with a ladder match for Seth’s briefcase. Your welcome, WWE.

    Winner- Ambrose by Dirty Deeds with his tongue hanging out.

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    4. Intercontinental Championship Battle Royal

    This match has too many guys to name. Let’s just say there are guys that are pushed too much, guys that are not pushed enough and Epico and Primo acting like they control a midget bull. I have four guys that will win this match and no, not one of them is Ziggler. Sheamus, Cesaro, The Miz and Bo Dallas. The Miz winning would give his return the boost it needs now that he is a heel again. Cesaro could use the title to show that the WWE has not forgotten about Wrestlemania already (even though they probably have). Sheamus should not win because that means WWE wants to combine the IC and U.S. titles and that is kid in the helmet retarded. That leaves Bo Dallas who can use the title to inspire those around him to aim higher and be better.

    Winner- Bo Dallas becomes the most inspirational champion ever. Bolieve!

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    5. The Usos vs. The Wyatts in a 2 out of 3 falls match for the Tag Team Championship

    I am saying this with ease; this will be the match of the night. These four guys have shown that when they have the time, they can put on a show. Add in a fun stipulation like 2 out of 3 falls and let’s get ready for more Harpercanrannas!

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    The Wyatts have been the best tag team over the past few months and The Usos will still be at the top of the division so losing the titles here isn’t a bad thing.

    Winner- The Wyatts via Clothesline from Smell (copyright- Matt Fowler)

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    6. AJ vs. Paige for the Divas Championship

    What a difference a month makes. After begging for Paige to have competition since Wrestlemania, AJ returns and wins back the Divas title. Now, instead of the long list of don’t care divas, we have a divas match on a PPV that I actually care about. Add in the whole “frienemy” angle between the two of them that is both fun and slightly arousing (honesty, oops).

    Winner- AJ because I want to see a full Paige heel turn.

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    7. Chris Jericho vs. Bray Wyatt

    Jericho is everything that is right about wrestling. He has his own life without being Y2J, but he comes back every now and then. Here is what makes him the best; he comes back to work with guys that he knows he can have a good feud with and he puts them over. Yeah, he is the anti-Nash/Hogan/any top guy from the 90’s. This was just what Bray Wyatt needed after his feud with Cena went on too long. Both can claim great mic skills and both can bring it in the ring. You would think Jericho would win here leading to Bray getting a bigger win at Summerslam, but as I said, Jericho doesn’t care about wins and losses.

    Winner- Bray Wyatt seals it with a kiss.

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    8. Kane vs. Randy Orton vs. Roman Reigns vs. John Cena in a Fatal Four Way Match for the WWE World Heavyweight Championship

    People are excited to see one out of four of these guys in the main event. Could it be the guy that has not been a constant for the past 10+ years? The magic 8-ball says: No shit. We all know where Summerslam is heading with the poster leaking weeks ago with John Cena and Brock Lesnar on it. I think this will be a decent match with three guys giving serviceable performances and one showing that he wants to be in the main event. Take a guess.

    And for those who think Paul Heyman’s “Plan C” is CM Punk; I wish I could be happy in this weird form of bliss you live in. Punk is too busy doing anything he wants which includes AJ, why would he even want to come back?

    Winner- John Cena, which still will be a surprise to some people. I know, I know.

  • Nerd Is As Nerd Does – The Pagemaster

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    As a child, one of my favorite movies in the whole world was The Pagemaster, for a variety of reasons: I loved books, the voice cast was beyond my wildest dreams, I bore a striking resemblance to Macaulay Culkin in glasses, dragons are awesome, bullies were also a problem for me, and Christopher Lloyd is a personal hero of mine. The character of Richard Tyler did frustrate me to no end, however, as he did not seem properly appreciative of being sucked into an animated world of adventure, and I was jealous of the fact that my own books were not anthropomorphic.

    I still adore that film, as well as the beautifully-illustrated hardback version of the book my parents bought me, and “look to the books” is essentially the driving force behind my interests and goals, be they academic, personal, and professional. I actively avoid thinking about the fact that there are books that I won’t ever get to read, because the concept makes me dizzy. I have been known to buy books instead of food – ramen and PB&J are sustenance, but hardly food – and I am always in need of at least two more bookshelves than I actually own or have space for.

    Over the past few years, however, I found myself slowly reading fewer and fewer full works; I keep track of anything new I finish every year, and so this decline was tracked in real-time. By the end of 2012, when I realized that I didn’t even average one book a month, I decided to start making an active change in how I spent my free time. The dry spell levelled out a bit in 2013, and I managed to get a dozen titles read, though that is hardly noteworthy; 2014 has been significantly better, and I am already at twelve titles, and that will probably be fifteen or sixteen by the end of July.

    As a quick point of clarification, I count comics and graphic novels separately from books, and so the amount of reading I am doing is still more than the average person. Considering that I gravitate toward titles by the likes of Alan Moore, Warren Ellis, Neil Gaiman, and Mike Mignola, it’s rarely a case that I’m reading comics because they are “easier” than books. Hell, the two books I most recently finished are genre fluff compared to something like League, but reading a book is distinctive from reading a comic in ways that I don’t have the right degrees to articulate.

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    Suffice to say that reading a book engages my mind in a way that is palpably different, and I was missing that feeling. I was also finding that writing was becoming more difficult – again, something I’m sure a person with more education in cognitive processes could expound upon – and that simply wasn’t acceptable. Finally, all posturing aside, not reading even a book a month left a bad taste in my mouth, and was compounded by the shame past-me already felt toward present-me for taking a financially secure desk job with a steady schedule, instead of travelling the world and chronicling it.

    For most of my youth, I was a voracious reader, to put it mildly; my parents and grandparents were very encouraging of this habit, but found themselves at an occasional loss as I burned through books with little regard for cost, often finishing titles the same day they had been purchased. In elementary school, our public library had a “bookmobile” that came around each month and allowed us to check out books; they allowed me to check out more than the maximum after only a few visits, and keep a few I particularly enjoyed beyond the due date.

    There were several ongoing series that I read, Goosebumps being the most prominent among them, but as with most young readers I frequently just grabbed books that looked interesting, and often didn’t realize until later – if I realized at all – that they were part of a series. Some of my favorite books and authors were discovered in this haphazard fashion, and there was always a feeling of excitement and realizing there was something more to be read. Probably the best example of this was Harry Turtledove’s “The World at War” novels; I bought the first book, Into the Darkness, at an airport kiosk because it was long and had a picture of a dragon on the front. When I reached the end, it seemed kind of abrupt, but I shrugged it off as “Maybe the author is making the point that war doesn’t always wrap up neatly.”

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    Imagine my surprise and delight, then, when around a year later I came across the second book, Darkness Descending, this time at a grocery store. After finishing it, I used the Internet to discover that the third book was already available in hardcover, but decided to keep reading them as mass market paperbacks. For the next four years – there were six books total – I looked forward to May, the end of school, and the release of the next book. High school came and went, and I was a sophomore in college when the series wrapped up, with a fair amount of my own living and growing up done in between.

    Over the course of my teens, this process repeated itself several times over: The Thousand Orcs, which the first book in its trilogy, is more than a dozen books into the Drizzt saga; Prophecy, the second book in the Symphony of the Ages, came home from the grocery store because it has a dragon on the cover; I bought the BattleTech novel Lethal Heritage because I loved the MechWarrior games, and it was years before I had copies of the next two in that trilogy; my dad was a big Anne Rice fan, and I read Memnoch the Devil before any of the other Lestat books, because he thought it stood well on its own.

    The point is, there was a time when my desire to read overrode any thoughts about making sure to check and see if the book was part of a series, let alone trying to acquire all of the books in said series before proceeding with the first one. In addition to not having the disposable income to make that work, younger me wouldn’t have been able to resist just going ahead and reading the book that what right there is front of me. It meant I read a few stinkers, and there are probably a dozen or more series that I only finished part of, but it produced what most people would consider a very well-read individual.

    Over the years, though, something changed that I can’t quite put my finger on, let alone identify exactly when it happened. I became focused on discerning if a book was part of a larger continuity, and wouldn’t read things unless I could get ahold of the “first” one; this was soon replaced by the drive to “catch ‘em all,” and books were put on the back-burner until I could buy the whole set, sometimes in one ill-advised and overly-expensive swoop. The end result – having a lot of books that don’t really get enough attention – is something I discuss to an extent in a previous article, but I want to focus on some different aspects here.

    The thrill of discovery in a bookstore, or the book aisle of more general shops, has been all but eliminated. I have such a massive backlog of things to read that there is literally a plan in place for what I’m going to read ten or twelve books in advance. There are notable exceptions from over the past year, such as Stephen King’s Joyland and Owen King’s Double Feature, which I bought at release and put aside other things to make room for. Trips to the used bookstore 2nd & Charles have also yielded gems such as Neuromancer and The Quantum Thief, both of which had caught my interest years ago but I had never gotten around to reading.

    There have been one-off casualties of my shift in reading tendencies, too, which I would be remiss to overlook. I pre-ordered Joe Hill’s NOS4A2, thinking it would fit in well with the other King family books from last year, but I wasn’t expecting the 700 page monstrosity that Amazon delivered. To use the most banal phrase imaginable when talking about reading, I simply hadn’t budgeted for the novel to be that long, and had other things on my plate. While the same length expectation wasn’t the case for Dan Simmons’ The Abominable – after Drood, I hardly expected something short – it has also been shelved until that magical day when I somehow have free time.

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    Enjoyment of a work right off the bat for its own sake has also been watered-down by the need to know if it is part of a larger universe, at which point I go all Ash Ketchum, as mentioned before. I was perusing Borders several years ago, well before they went out of business, and came across a novel called Matter, written by Iain M. Banks. I started to get it, but the inside cover revealed that there were other novels in his “Culture” setting, which I had never heard of, and none of which the store had on hand; I put it back and didn’t pick the series back up until last year.

    I did something similar within the exact same time frame with the works of Stephen Baxter, whose novel Ring was given to me, along with numerous other books, when Beth’s parents were getting ready for a move. This time, the web informed me that the book was part of the “Xeelee sequence,” whatever that was. I now have almost all of that series – there are a couple of novellas that are fairly overpriced – but still haven’t read any of them. It actually took a bit of research to determine what books went in what order, because the associations between them are more lax than in a traditional, numbered series.

    Multiple titles that connect to one another without formal structuring is actually a common practice, especially in sci-fi, that goes back longer than I care to appropriately research. In a way these books are designed for people to read exactly the way I used to, by picking up something that looks interesting and just diving in. I’m sure publishers appreciate this style, since it means they don’t have to worry about losing potential casual readers who see “Book 4” printed on the cover and move on to something else.

    The final big shift in my reading habits has been more gradual, and didn’t really jump out at me until I signed up for an online reading site recently and was adding books to my collection. In the past few years, the books that I have purchased and read have been almost exclusively science fiction. A deep-seated love of sci-fi is nothing new, as it has always been my favorite genre, but it used to be interspersed with other genres as well.

    Works in other genres have snuck in there, such as the offbeat pop-thriller Hitman’s Guide to Housecleaning, and a few books in Henning Mankell’s excellent Kurt Wallander mystery series, but otherwise I’ve been reading about spaceships or artificial intelligence. I’m currently in the middle of three books – a hard copy of Cibola Burn at home, the eBook of Use of Weapons at work, and the Endymion audiobook while I’m driving – each them a variant of the same essential concept.

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    While this shift is the result of multiple factors, such as a predisposition toward sci-fi on the part of the friends who suggest what books I read, I think the biggest impact has been my increasing tendency to purchase books online. Basically, I buy more sci-fi books than anything else, which means the shopping sites suggest more sci-fi books than anything else. This loop is further reinforced when blurbs on the books I am reading make mention of other books in that same genre, and so on. I’m not complaining, especially since I think science fiction is arguably more interesting and more important than any other genre, but I’ve already decided that the next book I read won’t have any lasers or faster-than-light travel.

    A sub-set of this narrowing in scope is that I have a few authors I follow, and even within the genre the rest fall by the wayside. I don’t have any qualms about picking up each new Dan Simmons or Stephen King book, obviously, and those writers often stray into new territory. Yet a lot of my shelves are filled by only a handful of writers, and I feel that is also negligent on my part as a reader. In the case of authors like Stephen Baxter, or Peter F. Hamilton, I have nearly a dozen books by each, yet have never actually read a work by either of them.

    Looking back on The Pagemaster, I wonder if maybe I judged young Richard too harshly, and ponder if I could ever recapture that sense of being thrust headlong into worlds of horror, adventure and fantasy. Perhaps I am the mysterious and powerful librarian, preparing the way for some young, bright-eyed child to step into those worlds; my hope has always been that my collection will be a legacy worth leaving to my children. In the back of my mind, though, I can’t help but look at my shelves of unread treasure and see the hoard of some great dragon, carefully acquired and jealously guarded, serving no purpose other than to be hoarded and gazed upon.

    At least that version features a dragon and not a sentient spacecraft…

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  • See The Trailer For Alien: Isolation DLC “Crew Expendable”, Featuring The Voices Of Sigourney Weaver, Tom Skerritt & Yaphet Kotto

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    Alien: Isolation was already near the top of my list for new games this year. Everything I have seen from the new game by The Creative Assembly made me believe that they knew just what Alien fans were expecting, especially after being violated by Gearbox with Aliens: Colonial Marines.

    Now with the DLC titled Crew Expendable, they have taken another step towards owning this Alien lovers heart.

    The cast of the 1979 original (Sigourney Weaver, Harry Dean Stanton, Tom Skerritt, Yaphet Kotto and Veronica Cartwright) will voice their game counterparts as you try to find and flush the alien from the Nostromo. Ash will be in the DLC also, but Ian Holm will not be voicing him.

    I wish I could convey the amount of feels hearing Weaver, Skerrit and Kotto in the new trailer for the DLC. Alien is my favorite film franchise, making this something special.

    Alien: Isolation releases on October 7th.

  • 7 Consoles You Probably Thought Were Sh**, And You Were Right

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    Atari Jaguar

    -Because nothing says “reclaiming past glory” like a “64-bit” console with a controller that actually makes less sense than using a computer keyboard. Alien vs. Predator was admittedly awesome, but White Men Can’t Jump…

    01 Magnavox Odyssey

    Magnavox Odyssey

    -Gets obvious points for being the first home console, but loses them all for having no sound and controllers that looked like you could give ultrasounds with them.

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    Vectrex

    -Because who doesn’t want their video game console to look like the TV screen in the chest of Robocop 2?

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    Philips CD-i

    -Besides giving us the shittiest Zelda game ever and having a controller that looks like a double-sided dildo head, it retailed for $700…in 1991 money.

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    3DO

    -The Steam Machine of the early 90’s. Made by multiple companies and way overpriced to compete in the home market, yet still sold 2 million consoles. Goldstar made one. GOLDSTAR!

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    Virtual Boy

    -Imagine a 3DS that weighed 5 pounds, sat on a stand (because taping it to your head hurt, FYI), had two d-pads and could only be played in a red color that I can only imagine being used in futuristic dystopian societies to light our crime-ridden streets.

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    Sega Nomad

    How awesome would a portable Genesis be? Pretty awesome if it didn’t have to use 6 AA batteries for five hours of play. Heat from the back of the unit may also scald children’s skin. Not a good PR move.

  • Want More Than 15 Minutes Of Dragon Age: Inquisition Gameplay? Good, Here Is 16

    Teasing my eyes and ears with new Dragon Age: Inquisition footage will get you everywhere, Bioware.

    So much pretty. Want to see more.

    Dragon Age: Inquisition releases on October 7th.

    My body is ready.

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  • Hulk Hogan Was The Third Man- 18 Years Ago Today

    It was 18 years ago today that Hulk Hogan turned on his fans and formed the N.W.O. with Kevin Nash and Scott Hall. How time flies when you have tried to erase the last decade of John Cena from your brain.

    Call it what you will. Wrestling’s Pearl Harbor (too soon?), the night that changed wrestling forever, whatever you want, just remember what it used to be like to be a wrestling fan in the late 90’s.

    Why hasn’t Toby Keith done a song about this yet?

    If this is Pearl Harbor does that mean Cena passing Flair’s championship reigns will be 9/11 (still too soon?)?

     

  • Nerd Is As Nerd Does- Writing On The Wall

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    I’ve been doing a lot of writing exercises lately, and the more I do – and the more I try to write on my creative pieces on the side – the more I realize that fiction may not be for me. It’s not that I don’t think I’m “talented” enough to write fiction, and there are certainly stories bouncing around in my head that I would like to tell. But the words flow most clearly when I’m analyzing, or just recording my thoughts on one thing or another. I know memoirs are big right now, but I’m not sure how well “Memoirs of a Twenty-Something Average Dude” would do on the shelves.

    It’s why my mind turns frequently toward academia, but the whole system just leaves a bad taste in the back of my mouth. Yes, it would be awesome to be in a university environment again, and be surrounded by people who are dedicated to being huge nerds about things I am also interested in. I don’t know what field I would even look into, though; Literature seems like the obvious choice, but not until Lit departments can mentally shut the doors on dusty old libraries, where people apparently stopped writing sometime in the early twentieth century.

    I have found a few programs that also allow for focus on outside materials, like comics or even movies and TV, but they rarely have the prestige of an actual Lit program. Also, after St. John’s and my “Liberal Arts” degree that no one seems to understand in conversation, I am hesitant to spend even more money on a degree that doesn’t necessarily have a field to go with it. Not that Lit is any better; the university system seems dead-set on hiring administrative staff over educators, to the point where all institutions are run like fucking corporations instead of places people learn.

    Nerd Rating seemed to offer a good outlet for writing in the style that suits me, but the sheer lack of traffic and readership understandably discourages me. The number of comments on the site by people who aren’t also writers can be counted without even resorting to using toes; Hell, we can’t even get people to comment or share on Facebook. It’s to the point where I know for a fact that some friends hear about something through NR, then go share the damned Bleeding Cool or Kotaku article about it instead of ours.

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    I didn’t mean for this to turn so bitchy; my original thought was just to talk about how I prefer to write about things, rather than necessarily write things myself. All of this is inherently tied together, though, because I realize that I won’t ever really get to dig into all the books, movies, games, and whatnot out there unless I can land some magical job where I get to talk about those experiences. I realize that having a good job, starting a family, providing for them, and just enjoying the experiences I do have for what they are would be a very good life, and more than what most people could hope for.

    I won’t ever really be happy with that, though. Not with my intellect, and my drive to dive into things, and constantly be thinking and growing and sharing. To rein it in a bit, I guess doing these exercises is a step in the right direction, so long as I keep up with them. “I wish someone would recognize my writing talent” sounds a bit flat when I don’t actually have any writing to shore up my claims. Hell, maybe I could get a piece out of this that I could shop around, or submit as a writing sample.

    The only other struggle – First World Problems to the max! – that I have is balancing wanting new things with actually getting into the things I already have, while still making sure I’m actually having fun. I have stopped bothering to try and keep track of all the games, movies, and books I have that have never been used, or half-used and then finished; it was starting to wear on my nerves. Still, only a lack of funds keeps me from ordering more and more things from Amazon. I started a new sci-fi book series the other night – Leviathan Wakes by James S.A. Corey – and the blurbs on the back mentioned the other great “space operas” this novel brings to mind. Hello eight new books on my “Sci-Fi Series” Amazon wishlist, which is now at sixty-three items; at the point where my lists are so genre-specific, you can imagine how many there are.

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    I’ve been doing my best to keep track of everything new I read, play, or watch each year, but what started out as a fun little memento has become something ominous; I feel driven to fill it more and more with each passing year. “I only read how many new books in 2013? Good Lord. And I call myself a scholar.” This creates tension when I put aside one thing to start something new, or want to play or watch something I have already seen. I honestly had to keep from feeling guilty when I watched Star Wars for “May the Fourth be with you,” and it is my favorite movie. I kept thinking about how I could use that two hours for something I didn’t memorize almost two decades ago.

    Thankfully, I was able to just watch the movie and enjoy it once it started, but the thought was still there. I can’t tell you how much that part of my brain rebelled while I was reading The Lord of the Rings again this year; “More than 1200 pages worth of reading, and we can’t mark any of it down on the list.” Even worse, I realized that my memories of reading the trilogy from high school were almost nonexistent; how in Valinor did I forget THE LORD OF THE RINGS after barely ten years? I was genuinely bothered by how little I recalled, and it still bothers me if I focus on it too much.

    The point I am hopefully working toward is being able to enjoy things, old or new, as they cross my path, or when I decide to seek them out. I shake my head when I think about college and grad school, when I had genuine days off that I spent sleeping until early afternoon, instead of consuming every piece of media possible. That’s a fatalistic approach, living in the past, and so going forward I just have to try harder not to take free time for granted. For instance, there’s new content out for Titanfall today, so we’re going to play tonight; while it’s true I “beat” Titanfall weeks ago, does that really make the time I spend with Erich and Tillman and Beth less worthwhile?

    It’s been years since I watched The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy – I’ve already seen it, after all – but I really should watch it again if for no other reason to listen to Slartibartfast deliver some of my favorite lines in film history: “I think that the chances of finding out what’s actually going on are so absurdly remote that the only thing to do is to say, ‘Hang the sense of it,’ and keep yourself busy. I’d much rather be happy than right any day.”

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  • Nerd Is As Nerd Does- Twitch TV

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    A while back Erich and I finally managed to get the Twitch.TV app for the Xbox One to work; the idea is that it allows players to broadcast their play sessions live, while other players can watch and participate via chat. I have openly mocked the idea of people who spend any significant amount of time watching live-streams of competitive gaming; I refuse to use the terms “eSports” because video gaming is not a fucking sport, and the players are not fucking athletes, and I could rage about that for days.

    Last night, though, I did a broadcast of Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes as Erich followed along, and the end result was actually fairly entertaining. Erich has tried to get into MGS before and been a little put off by the mechanics, but this one mixes things up enough that his interest has been renewed. We decided to try the broadcast feature out with me playing so he could see how a veteran MGS player gets things done.

    The answer to that turned out to be “not half bad,” although toward the end I got too arrogant and got spotted because I was rushing along without any situational awareness. The biggest problem we encountered is that the stream isn’t actually “live;” there is a delay of at least a few minutes, which was further exacerbated by Twitch forcing Erich to watch random commercials in the middle of me playing, putting him even further behind. One commercial apparently involved skateboarding wookies, which angered me enough that I killed a guard without provocation in the middle of sneaking past him.

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    Both Microsoft and Sony made a big deal about live streaming when the new consoles were unveiled, and showed off as-yet-fictional features like picture-in-picture Skype chat while playing games, or one friend guiding another through a difficult section of a game by watching the live stream. Erich tried to guide me to a prisoner he had found but I had previously missed, but the lag meant that I had often passed by a turn I was supposed to take by the time he saw me getting to it.

    I don’t know that I would ever broadcast just for the sake of broadcasting, like Todd has taken to doing; Todd has the kind of personality that lends itself to these things, though, and has been making gameplay videos for years. There’s the option to turn on the Kinect microphone and even the camera, so that viewers can watch and listen to your reactions, but that just doesn’t appeal to me. Since the broadcasts are public access, other viewers joined from time to time last night, and each time I couldn’t get over the feeling that my gameplay was being judged.

    As it turns out, Twitch.TV is also available to stream from 360 and PC, and it seems like anyone logged in on one device should be able to watch games from another. That theoretically means I could broadcast something like Fallout 3 on PC while Erich and Tillman watch on the One, with all of us in a party so we can chat. Actually finding a broadcast and viewing it was a headache in and of itself, though, and adding in more people across different platforms might be more trouble than it is worth. All in all, I’d say that game streaming is a cool concept, but is still behind the curve of full functionality and accessibility.

  • Review: Slight Return

    http://youtu.be/H7DpVAJjfcQ
    All honesty up front about this review- I have a small part in it. So I am reviewing this with some bias. It would be a complete lie to say I could do so otherwise.

    In 1999, two teenagers made a crime drama called Revolver Action. It was a VHS wonder that would never see the light of day beyond the family and friends who were involved with it.

    Behold the power on the internet!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AKfkQVsjYaM

    Very rough, yet who am I to judge? I never made a movie in my teenage years. They have a one-up on me (and maybe you) there.

    Now fifteen years later the events of Revolver Action come back to haunt Cain and Whitey when their former associate Mr. Fat is killed and they learn that the brother of the man they betrayed is out for revenge.

    Helped out by a former F.B.I. agent, they work their way through anybody that knows where the man threatening their families lives is hiding as he plans his vengeance.

    If you take the time to watch Revolver Action you will see how much better Slight Return looks and feels. The cuts and wipes are well done and you can’t beat the soundtrack. The montage in the middle of the film should have you smiling even if you had nothing to do with this film.

    greg gun

    I wish there could have been a bit more exposition spent on Michael’s character exploring more of his ruthlessness. While the body count is high, Michael could have had a few more bloody kills to add to his vengeful nature in the film. Who knows, maybe there is a third brother hanging around out there?

    I don’t know if they filmed Revolver Action with a sequel in mind, but now that one has come and the story has been expanded, I would not mind seeing more from Cain and Whitey, even though they are “done”.

    I said I would review this movie without any bias, but I simply can’t. I won’t blow smoke up your ass and say this movie is anything more than it is. There are flaws, yes, but there is also a lot of hard work involved and the finished product came out (to me) enjoyable as hell.

    I hope you will give Slight Return a watch and tell us what you think about it. It runs only 45 minutes and if you have seen all three Transformers movies you have used nine hours of your life for that, spend 45 minutes giving this a try and leave your comments below.

    And watch the outtakes after the movie is over. There may or may not be a True Detective bit.

    NERD RATING- 7.5 8.5 (sorry, it gets a bump because, reasons)

    SRposter

    Larry creep_Still001caleb step in couch_Still001

  • Money In The Bank 2014 Predictions

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    Hey, what do you know? A wrestling post. I know, I know. I am behind, but Money in the Bank is Sunday so I figured we would go through the card to see what will go down when all the lights are turned off and all the ladders have been broken.

    Plus, there are only four matches announced so far, so this should be quick and relatively painless. Kind of like a sexual experience with me.

    Let’s go!

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    1. Paige vs. Naomi for the Divas Championship

    It is a sad thing to say that a Paige match is being used as the start of a Fuckadactyl (I meant to leave out the n) feud. Rumor is that Vince is not behind Paige because he doesn’t get her “look”. If by that he means he forgot what a woman with in-ring talent looks like, then he is right. This match will probably be given the spot of death right before the main event doing them no favors.

    Winner: Paige when Cameron interferes and cost Naomi the match which makes the viewer believe Naomi can beat Paige, but we should never believe that. Ever.

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    2. The Usos vs. Eric Rowan and Luke Harper for the Tag Team Championships

    With a card lacking matches this should be given plenty of time unlike the two quick singles matches on last week’s Raw. A Wyatt Family victory could bode well for Bray winning the MITB championship match and ending the night with a Wyatt sweep (which won’t happen, see later to see why). I would like to see a Clothesline from Smell (Copyright 2014- Matt Fowler) and a Wyatt win, but this looks like it will be another Jimmy superkick and Jey splash or Jey superkick and Jimmy splash finish. Who the hell knows, I can’t tell them apart.

    Winner: The Usos by twinking finishing moves.

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    3. Dean Ambrose vs. Seth Rollins vs. RVD vs. Jack Swagger vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Bad News Barrett in a Money in the Bank Ladder Match

    After Raw I had three picks to win this match; Ambrose, Rollins or Barrett. Now it is down to two because thanks to the pot smoking clusterfuck that is Jack Swagger, Barrett was injured on Smackdown and may not even be in the match. RVD is there to make things look like they hurt, same for Ziggler. Swagger is there to bleed accidentally and hurt more people. And Kofi…I don’t know, affirmative action?

    That leaves Rollins and Ambrose whose feud is one of the best things WWE has going. I am going with Rollins winning because it will help his character out better and I don’t think the WWE wants two faces winning both ladder matches (again, see next match).

    Winner: Seth Rollins when he pulls a Damien Sandow from last year (match wise, not career wise, hopefully).

    20140623_LARGE_Match_DelRio_Sheamus_Orton_Bray_Cesaro_Cena_Reigns_KANE

    4. Sheamus vs. John Cena vs. Cesaro vs. Alberto Del Rio vs. Randy Orton vs. Bray Wyatt vs. Kane vs. Roman Reigns in a Money in the Bank Ladder Match for the WWE Championship

    I would love to wax poetic about the why’s and where’s, the who’s and what’s of this match. About how this should be an intriguing championship match with any number of winners. Cesaro proving Paul Heyman right when he says he is the greatest manager of all time, Bray Wyatt taking hold of the championship and the mind-bendingly good promos and matches that will come from it, Roman Reigns becoming the next “man” in the WWE.

    But I don’t get to because it is almost guaranteed that Brock Lesnar is getting a title match next month at Summerslam against the winner of this match. That leaves two choices; Cesaro or John Cena. Cesaro winning would mean we get a match with the two biggest genetic freaks in the WWE and we would be left, mouths agape, at the strength shown.

    Or…

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    WWE can give away the main event in a poster leak ruining any drama this ladder match would create.

    Brock beating Cena will help matters because I am a huge Lesnar fan and Cena hater which is a great twofer if this is the Summerslam main event. It also means Cena would have his fifteenth (15!) championship run, one behind Ric Flair. Which also means we are one step closer to him passing Flair which will be the day I am done with wrestling after 30+ years.