Category: Movies

  • Review: Thor: The Dark World

    Photo courtesy nypost.com
    Photo courtesy nypost.com

    Thor was Marvel’s biggest gamble when it released in 2011. Movie audiences had accepted Iron Man but would they connect with a superhero steeped in mythology and magic? Luckily Thor was a hit thanks to good casting, Kenneth Branagh’s direction and knowing that the film was one of the lead-ins to The Avengers. Now comes the tricky part; making the character’s continuing story interesting.

    Thor: The Dark World takes place two years after Thor and one year after The Avengers with Jane Foster (Natalie Portman) doing her scientist thing and following spatial anomalies in hopes of tracking down her god with the perfect abs. This leads to her finding a weapon called the Aether which binds itself to her and reawakens Malekith (Christopher Eccleston), a Dark Elf who needs it to cover the nine realms in eternal darkness. You know, comic book stuff.

    When Malekith attacks Asgard and kills one of their own it is all hands on deck to bring him down. The only difference is that Thor and Odin’s plans are exact opposites with Odin acting like the young, war-hungry Thor from the first film letting vengeance guide him and Thor wants to lead Malekith far away from Asgard to spare as many lives as possible. I liked this twist in roles that shows exactly how Thor has embraced his role and matured.

    One large plus that the Thor franchise has over any other Marvel movie is that Tom Hiddleston’s Loki is going to be involved. He once again steals the movie as the fallen prince who tried to take over Earth. He spends his days locked in a dungeon prison until Thor has no choice but to break him out to show him a secret path out of Asgard. As with everything involving the character there are many illusions and lots of subterfuge involved and some of it you will not see coming, even though you know Loki has something planned out.

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    Thor: The Dark World benefits from its director, Alan Taylor. One of the regular directors for Game of Thrones, the show’s influence can be seen and felt all during the movie. From Asgardian forces in battle to how the city looks during celebrations and also with the clothing that is less royalty and more cloaks of Westeros. Branagh used his Shakespeare background in the first movie to the best of his ability and Taylor does the same with his use of realism in a fantasy setting.

    With Loki taking up the grey area between good and evil Malekith is enough of a presence to keep the proceedings moving forward. He is not a legendary villain like Red Skull but he is a constant threat even if his character and motivation is a bit by the numbers.

    The secondary cast have plenty of time to contribute. This could have easily been Thor & Loki’s Excellent Adventure but the script gives each character at least one or two times to shine. Sif and the Warriors Two (I say two because Hogun is helping his home world to begin the movie) are just as loyal to Thor as ever even to bring treason on themselves. I like how they are already planting seeds for the third Thor with Sif’s apparent feelings for Thor and her obvious wonder at why he loves a mortal. Zachary Levi takes over the role of Fandral (which he was cast for in the first movie but had to decline due to his schedule) and is charming as hell. Idris Elba as Heimdall once again proves that he is amazing in everything and even Rene Russo’s Frigga gets a chance to show off more than a glimpse of being a badass for a nice change of pace.

    I am here to tell you that reports of Thor: The Dark World’s mediocrity are exaggerated. Now that we know these characters we get a chance to see them further fleshed out including the parts that could have easily been left by the wayside. Where Iron Man has Tony Stark’s personality and Captain America has his never-ending belief in doing good to push their roles forward, Thor relies on family ties and they are explored and exploited in good ways in Thor: The Dark World and it does it while setting up Thor 3, Guardians of the Galaxy and The Avengers: Age of Ultron at the same time. By the hammer of Thor indeed.

     

    NERD RATING- 8.5/10

     

     

     

  • Weekend Box Office- November 8-10, 2013

     

    Photo courtesy nypost.com
    Photo courtesy nypost.com

    Thor landed in first as expected with $86.1 million which is nowhere near the insane $175 million Iron Man 3 opened with back in May but it was a good increase over the original film’s opening of $65 million in 2011. In two weeks the sequel has amassed a hefty $327 million worldwide and will pass the original’s entire theatrical run next week.

    Thor and company should rule the box office again next week and then will have to get out of the way for The Hunger Games: Catching Fire on November 22nd which is looking to have an insane $150 million opening.

    1. Thor: The Dark World- $86.1 million/ $86.1 million

    2. Bad Grandpa- $11.3/ $78.7

    3. Free Birds- $11.1/ $38.1

    4. Last Vegas- $11.1/ $33.5

    5. Ender’s Game- $10.8/ $44.0

    6. Gravity- $8.4/ $231.1

    7. 12 Years a Slave- $6.6/ $17.3

    8. Captain Phillips- $5.8/ $90.9

    9. About Time- $5.1/ $6.6

    10. Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs 2- $2.8/ $109.9

     

     

  • Star Wars Episode VII Officially Set For December 18, 2015

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    Disney ended all speculation today by announcing that Star Wars Episode VII would release on December 18, 2015. It will be the first Star Wars movie to not open in the summer. Keeping with the times it will release in 3D (yay?) so expect a lot of lightsabers coming at the screen.

    Recently J.J. Abrams asked Disney to delay the movie until 2016 but got a no from the Disney executives so this seems to be the closest thing Abrams would get. The director has teamed up with The Empire Strikes Back writer Lawrence Kasdan to take over the script from screenwriter Michael Arndt to get the project back on track. The new release date also makes sure that Disney’s eggs aren’t all in the same basket with The Avengers: Age of Ultron opening in May 2015. Now with Episode VII in December Disney should rule the year at the box office.

    It doesn’t have to match the quality of the original films, just be better than the prequels. Please.

     

  • New Trailer For Robocop

    Photo courtesy bkbn.net
    Photo courtesy bkbn.net

    The newest trailer for Robocop is here and it is full of new footage including more ED-209 fun.

    I know most may write this off as just another remake but I believe this can be something more than that. If they are able to use the same cynical look at society that the original movie showed and use the cast to its potential then this should be a lot of fun.

    Robocop releases on February 12, 2014.

  • Star Wars Vibrators: These Are Not The Orgasms You Are Looking For

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    If there is one thing that the internet has given us it is the ability to see the creativity that lurks on this big planet that might have gone unnoticed otherwise. Now where some would say that Star Wars Vibrators are not all that creative I say “What have you come up with lately?”.

    Check out the other variations here by Balazs Sarmai that include a C3PO and R2D2 theme.

    Am I the only one that thinks the Slave 1 is made to be a vibrator both in design and name? Not to mention how easy it would be to make something with an offshoot of Leia Organa’s name.

  • The Hobbit: The Desolation Of Smaug’s New Trailer Has All The Sherlock And Watson You Want

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    Why hello there new trailer for The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug. You look very pretty and epic in scale. You would think with this being the fifth film from Peter Jackson about Tolkien books that I would not get as many goosebumps. You would be wrong.

    The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug releases on December 13th.

  • Weekend Box Office- November 1-3, 2013

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    Ender’s Game opened at number one as expected and the gross was right around expectations. Orson Scott Card’s classic sci-fi story had a huge cast including Ben Kingsley, Harrison Ford and Viola Davis but could not break through to a huge opening collecting $28 million. With Thor opening next week it does not bode well for Ender’s staying power. Last Vegas (or Geriatric Hangover) finished in third just ahead of the animated Free Birds. Gravity earned $15.1 million in its fifth week of release.

    Thor: The Dark World was the big story even though it does not open here until next week. The God of Thunder opened in multiple markets overseas and brought in a mighty $109 million. That is a huge head start on what is sure to be a big weekend coming up for the Marvel film.

    1. Ender’s Game- $28.0 million/ $28.0 million

    2. Bad Grandpa- $20.5/ $62.0

    3. Last Vegas- $16.5/ $16.5

    4. Free Birds- $16.2/ $16.2

    5. Gravity- $15.1/ $219.1

    6. Captain Phillips- $8.5/ $82.5

    7. 12 Years a Slave- $4.6/ $8.7

    8. Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs 2- $4.2/$106.1

    9. Carrie- $3.4/ $31.9

    10. The Counselor- $3.2/ $13.3 

  • How Do You Make People Care About Thomas Kinkade? Just Add Star Wars

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    Remember Thomas Kinkade? The nicknamed “painter of light” that older people love paying way too much for his paintings and even more on gaudy ass gold light-up frames for said pieces? Well get ready to join their way of thinking.

    Artist Jeff Bennett has taken Kinkade’s paintings of houses that look like a Middle-Earth Parade of Homes and added just a touch of the galaxy far, far away. I can not imagine what made him think of this but the brilliance can not be denied. Take a look at all the works below and begin to plan about where you want to put them in your homes. Your journey to becoming your parents is almost complete.

    On a side note: for someone that painted such serene environments, Kinkade had a Poe worthy death. He literally drank himself to death on a bender with the well thought out concoction of liquor and Valium. Think that’s messed up? It gets better. He died on Good Friday. Remember that when you are at your parents or grandparents house next Easter staring at their painting on the wall.

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  • Amazon Has The Alien Anthology For Under $20

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    Amazon is already gearing up for Black Friday with sales all the way up until the big day and today’s deal is particularly good. You can get the Alien Anthology Blu-Ray Set for only $19.49 in the Gold Box Deal of the Day. That is 72% off the regular price.

    This is a stupid good deal.

    How good a deal is this? I paid full price for this when it came out three years ago and I am not even mad about having it be available this cheap. It is the most comprehensive Blu-Ray collections I have ever bought and still watch the movies and special features on a regular basis. If you are in any way a fan of this series you owe yourself to pick it up today.

    To complete your collection Amazon is also offering Prometheus on Blu-Ray for $9.49.

    Get on this deal here and hurry, it is only available today.

  • Halloween: Best To Worst

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    Happy Halloween! My second favorite holiday is here and that means watching my favorite horror series ever. So I decided I would give everyone an easy list of all the movies in the Halloween franchise from best to worst.

    Beware! William Shatner masks and annoying singing TV commercials ahead.

    1. Halloween (1978)

    I decided to do this list first to worst instead of vice versa because the real intrigue is what will be at the bottom. The original John Carpenter classic will always be number one. It brought a new kind of terror to theaters 35 years ago and essentially created the slasher movie craze.

    2. Halloween II (1981)

    After Halloween hit John Carpenter became the next big thing for directors. He was too busy with his schedule of finishing up The Fog and filming Escape from New York to come back for the sequel but he and partner Debra Hill wrote the script which continued the story of Laurie Strode and Michael Myers on the same night. While there is a dip in quality, its hospital backdrop has always been a favorite of mine. Also, it has given us the song that Bud sang. “Amazing Grace, come sit on my face. Don’t make me cry, I need your pie.”

    3. Halloween (2009)

    After a five year break, Michael Myers returned in the form of Rob Zombie’s Halloween. The director retold the origin story of Michael and his subsequent madness in today’s time and it worked. It was brutal, visceral and made way for new versions of Nightmare on Elm Street and Friday the 13th. Did anyone else find it weird seeing Danielle Harris nude after watching 4 & 5 so many times?

    4. Halloween H20: 20 Years Later (1998)

    Acting as if Halloween 4-6 never happened, Jamie Lee Curtis returned as Laurie Strode in the sequel to Halloween 1 & 2. Still haunted by memories of that one night 20 years earlier even though she has moved across country and changed her name, Michael returns to come after her and her son. You also get an early Joseph Gordon Levitt death.

    5. Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers (1988)

    When Halloween 3’s attempt at a new singular story failed to capture anyone’s imaginations it was decided that Michael Myers and Dr. Loomis needed to come back from the supposed dead that happened at the end of Halloween 2. With Jamie Lee Curtis off being one of the most popular actresses in Hollywood, the writers killed her off in a car wreck and had Michael return to go after her daughter played by Danielle Harris. It was a decent addition to the franchise and had good box office since Michael Myers was back.

    6. Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers (1996)

    A young Paul Rudd plays Tommy Doyle, the boy Laurie Strode was babysitting in the original Halloween. Jamie Lloyd (not played by Danielle Harris) is killed off and her baby is hunted down by Michael and some secret society that want to harness his power. This was Donald Pleasence’s last appearance as he died between filming being completed and the movie’s release.

    7. Halloween 5: The Curse of Michael Myers (1989)

    Halloween 4 was a hit so how did the studio react to it? By rushing out a sequel only a year later which put Halloween 4’s good ending on the back burner and had Danielle Harris return as Jamie Lloyd only to have her do her best Jodie Foster Nell impression for the first half of the movie. I always wonder what could have been if this had not been put on the fast track.

    8. Halloween: Resurrection (2002)

    Halloween 2 director Rick Rosenthal returned to the franchise which also had Jamie Lee Curtis return as Laurie Strode for a few minutes. Then she died. Yep. On the run for 24 years and she lost. Michael returns home to see that a reality show has invaded his home and he starts offing folks until Busta Rhymes kung-fu fights him in a fire. I shit you not. It sounds like I just completely put a random set of words together to make a movie plot but this is really it.

    9. Halloween II (2009)

    Two years earlier Rob Zombie’s Halloween became the highest grossing movie in the franchise and people like me were excited when he came back to direct the sequel. What happened? Michael lumbers around with a lumberjack beard hanging from the bottom of his mask and almost stabs everyone in the face while sounding like he is having the world’s best/creepiest orgasm. I don’t know why Zombie got so face stab happy but it was a bit creepy. Scout Taylor-Compton returned as Laurie but the script called for her to act like such a massive bitch that I was actually hoping Michael would hurry up and stab her in the face 43 times. They also turned Malcolm McDowell’s Dr. Loomis into a fame-seeking asshole that I wished had stayed dead in the first movie.

    10. Halloween III: Season of the Witch (1982)