Take a look a Microsoft’s big money deal with Pepsi and realize that as absolutely stupid as this may seem, it is still a smarter business move than anything Microsoft did this week at E3.

How would you get one of these Xbox One “packages”? Just go here and tell Major Nelson why you want this future heart attack at 55 more than anyone else. You should just tell him that you walk around with a t-shirt that says “If you don’t like DRM, you are a tool”.

Now, if you do not have an internet connection, Microsoft is suggesting that you take your poor ass to Wal-Mart and buy your own Mountain Dew and Doritos and don’t even look at these special ones with your dirty, grimy, hobo sack on a stick lives.